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self-esteem torn down
Okay so in the beginning of my junior year I had a crush on this guy and he had told me he really really liked me...soo I was talkin to my guy friend and askin if i should ask him out or sumthin and he said i should so somehow that got around and my crush started freakin out
and started ignoring me
and started talkin shit behind my back and makin fun of me in front of me cause he's friends with my friends soooo i was completely crushed for a month i was depressed out of my mind. He's an asshole of course but I just felt like a fuckin loser because of the complete and total humilliation and rejection. So anyway I'm pretty much over it but I'm not the same, before all that happened I was a happy go lucky girl, confident, highest self esteem ever and he pretty much tore me down little by little. I've never been able to fully recover...probly becuz i put up walls with everyone i meet becuz im afraid that i will get made fun of or get hurt again. So im never able to just be myself around anyone else except for my 2 best friends.
Can anyone help me to get over this so i can be me again??
I will rate a 5 to anyone who really tries to help :D
thankss
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well mabe he was shy of you and thats why he was talkin like that but i dont no him so..
I think that you should look around your school for a new crush and talk to your friends about how you feal. Y would people care if he rejected you everyone in your school will eventally get rejected and as soon as you start at your new crush every one will forget about what happend with you and that other guy.
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Hey!
Well there are some things you can try to build up your self esteem. I have a pretty low confidence level, and at times, low self esteem, so I know where you're coming from.
One exercise I do regularly, is standing in front of the mirror. Sometimes that can be hard for people with low self esteem. stand there and smile. Think about what kinds of things make you smile, and think about how awesome it is to see yourself smile. then try and do everything you can in life to make yourself smile. I mean if you're in a bad mood, think of something happy, if you dont feel like you can be confident, think of how much more happy you are when you are outgoing.
also in front of the mirror, list things that are amazing about you (ex. I have great hair, I have a great smile, I have a great personality, I am carefree, I love my friends). pick one everyday and tell yourself that. try and revert away from looks (like I look cute in this t-shirt etc, but if it comes to that, then those are good too).
you need to make your feelings known, to yourself and to others. if you are angry, make sure you know it, make sure other people know it. if you are frustrated, dont be afraid to show it.
I know you play it over and over in your head, but you need to write down exactly what happened with this guy. Write down every detail. then read through it and think about a few things, what you did wrong, how much of a jerk he was, what you could do better next time, what about all of this still hurts you so much. there are clearly emotions there that havnt been fully touched on, otherwise you wouldnt still feel this way.
You need to learn how to be more confident again. (I know, its harder than it sounds). I can only say from experience, but I used to take a lot of acting/drama/musical theatre classes, they are honestly the places/times when I was the most confident I have ever been. I laughed and I wasnt afraid to break out of my shell. I would HIGHLY recommend trying one out. It really can be worth it. Everyone is putting themselves out there and you're not the only one.
I think you need to start seeing other guys (I dont know if you have been or not). you need to fight the risks of fear and rejection and get back out there. I know its tough, but you can do it, I believe in you. you can only become more confident with talking to guys if you do it more often! so give it a shot okay.
I hope that helps out a bit, but you have to keep an open mind and be willing to try anything. Those are just a few things that you can do, but I can help you out way more if you need some thing else okay? Good luck, and i hope I helped,
Love ya,
angie91
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Hey! this same thing happens to me. Honestly, it is really hurtfull. Try to make things better, dont let him bother you, there are tons of guys out there and he is just not worth wasting your time over. Try to be nice to everyone, there is no need to put up a complete shield, but you dont need to go poring your secrets out with everyone. Building trust is a hard thing, but once you do you can do it over and over agian. Your friends will stick by your side no matter what, and you should thank them for that. Lets see you happy again, cause life is to short to waste being sad.
Good luck =)
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