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boyfriend...
My boyfriend and I have been talking about having sex. We have had sex before, but he thinks it would be cool if we try something new. Like having sex with one more person. He wants a girl obviously. I wouldn't mind cus i'm bi. But should we or not? will this hurt our relationship?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Lots of relationships have been ruined by threesomes, but lots of people have found them to be an enjoyable and fun way of mixing things up. The main reasons it hurts someone's relationship is because the girl is only doing it to make the guy happy or vice versa, the girl has jealousy issues, the guy isn't happy with just the girl, or the extra person likes one person more than the other.
You need to have a proper and long conversation about this, and need to talk about these things:
1. *Why* he wants it. To spice things up? Because it would just be more fun? To try it out and experiment? Because he'd enjoy seeing you with another girl? Or... because he's not satisfied with you? because he just wants 2 girls for himself?
2. Why you want it. The questions above, but modified obviously.
3. *What* he wants. How far does he want to go with this girl? How far do you want to go? How far will you go with each other?
4. What *you* want out of it. Again, same for you.
Before you actually do it, here's a checklist:
* All 3 people treating each other equally. No concentrating on just one person for all of it. Maybe no penetration, as it tends to leave one person out, unless you're doing something in a circle (eg person a penetrates person b, person b does oral on person c, person c does oral on person a)
* Talk about it before hand with the other girl and identify your limits.
* The girl should be bi too, obviously, and preferably someone you don't know too well, who either has a crush on both of you or won't favour one over the other.
* You *and* your boy both have to like the girl. It's no good if she's just good for one of you.
This shouldn't be just an offhand thing, this should be something you should think about a lot, but if you do, it can be very fun and rewarding. Good luck :)
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Yes it would. Why would he want another girl in there? Aren't you good enough? I don't mean to be blunt but come one. Yes this will hurt the relationship. How awkward would it be to have another girl fooling around with your boyfriend. It also spreads the risk of STD' so it can also be dangerous. Talk to him and really get an exact answer for why he would want this and how would he feel if you had another boy instead of a girl?
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