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pastor
i am a 16 year old teenage girl .. my parents are divorced and my dad is verbally abusive, like he says he doesnt love me and i dont have a relationship with him. im EXTREMELY involved in my parish and have gotten close with my pastor over the past 3 years, hes like a father figure. but i dont like it because i get so jealous when he even TALKS to another kid or asks for their help and not mine, im afraid he wont like me anymore. i hate this feeling of jealousy its like controlling my life. ive never had good self esteem but im afraid he will stop liking me and like someone else better. how can i make this stop and not feel jealous anymore?
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I know how you feel.
My dad's the same way.
Except maybe worse.
So, just know that you're not alone & if you ever need anything to talk about, I'm here & you can just drop a question by in my inbox.
Well, this pastor probably feels as if your his own daughter. But, he also has to help the rest of the church community, & that definitely does not mean he loves you any less. Try & remember that there's always one person who you loves you no matter what -- God. He never leaves your side, no matter what. =)
Try to talk about your problems with someone. Maybe you feel that these jealous tendencies are a private matter. In that case, try talking to a counselor at your school or something about your problem.
Good luck! =)
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it sounds like you have attached yourself to a male figure who will listen and cares. just because he is speaking to other children does not mean he does not care about you and your problems.
a pastor is there as a helper to god, god loves all of his children, and has to listen to every persons prayers. do you think god should only listen to yours? that isnt quite fair, now is it.
you really should talk to your mother about this, if you feel comfortable enough with her. and express how you feel. also, school counselors are amazing. i know it sounds lame, but they have a degree in this stuff and are great to talk to. they dont judge you because of what you say, and plus they help you get into college.
feel free to talk to an adult figure, but dont get jelious that he is helping others. that is what he is here for. :}
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Have you talked to a counselor or anybody else about how you feel about this? Since your dad shows you no love, I think that you think your pastor won't love you if you don't get attention from him, since your father didn't supply you with any attention. But you have to remember, that he isn't your father, he won't verbally abuse you or put you down, he is your father figure and I'm sure he loves you like a daughter, but he is friendly and needs to provide his love and attention to other people as well as you. His feelings won't change for you if he converses and asks other people to help him out he is trying to include them and is probably trying his best to not exclude you. He is only one person, and has a job, but I'm sure he means well and doesn't realzie that he is making you feel this way. You should talk to a counselor in your school or outside of school about this. Talk to him also about how you feel. Or write down ur feelings in poems, a diary, journal, song or story, it helps a lot, trust me. But you are a great person and are loved by many people, believe me.
Good luckk, and remember, you are a great person, worthy of the respect and love you deserve.
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