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Is this guy ive been with for 6 months the guy for me?
Hi Krystal im almost 16 years old, and i have been dating my boyfriend for 6 months. Hes always jealous, even when i hang out with my close girlfriends! Supposidly there was a rumor going around that he cheated on me with one of my best friends, he told me that she kissed him, and my ex bff said that this never happened, so i dnt know wut to believe! He sent me roses and cried for me to take him back. I did loose my virginity to him so its hard for me to let go. Im still young and since hes my first real bf its hard. He alwyas tells me that he loves me and if i have a problem he always helps me. I know hes a good person deep down but i just dont know if hes the right one for me. My mom and dad dislike him because of all the things that went on. But they obv dont know that i lost my virginity because that would be a differnt story. He deleted all the guys numbers out of my phone, begs for me to delete my myspace, ( i have no guy friends on there) im not aloud to talk to guys in school or go out with my friends, and if i do he has to complain about it. Hes nice to me untill something doesnt go his way, then he starts getting loud. He has NEVER hurt me in any way but i just feel that hes to controlling. I am still young and i dont know wut love is, but i do care about him and since hes older than me he tells me all the time i want to marry you and cute stuff like that. I go to all his family parties im close with his family, but i just need help becuase im so confused and who knows if hes cheating on me? i have no idea so can you please help me make a decision. Thanks so much!
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You may not like me after my answer but, here it goes...
I was in your EXACT situation when i was your age. I'm not trying to act like some wise woman, but since your asking advice, that's what I'm doing.
The situation I went through, that your sort of going through now is one of the main reasons I started giving advice on this site except, my story is much longer and horrible but had parts of what yours does so, I DO understand.
I don't know you, but I don't think any girl should go through even a little of what I went I through...
Just because he has never technically, physically hurt you doesn't mean much. He IS hurting you by what he's doing.
If he cheated on you with one of your best friends, (whether it was a rumor or not) that right there is a red flag... But, the same thing happened to me so I'm not one to judge on breaking things off just because of that.
He IS very controlling over you though. You had a life before him and you deserve to have a life while your with him too, other wise, he is just not worth it.
You are young, and I understand he was your first, but you deserve better than that.
I hate to say this but, even when parents don't know the whole situation, they still know when things aren't right sometimes...
I think the hardest thing for you is to let him go because he was your first. Why? Because I've been there. You have to trust me when I say that it is not the end of the world. Believe me, I swore up and down that it was though at the time...
He shouldn't be touching your phone and deleting your numbers. Tell him that's not cool and unnecessary. If he can have numbers of girls in his phone, you can have numbers of guys in yours. It's a two way street, whether he is older than you or not.
A lot of the time (I've noticed) from my situation and other peoples situations, that when I guy is very paranoid and controlling but yet acts all lovey to you at other times, there is something going on that he doesn't want you to know. ex: another girl(s)
I'm sure that everytime your about show him the door is mostly when he starts buttering you up and telling you he wants to marry you, OR he does it when he thinks your talking to another guy and also him loving you so much is his reason for being so jealous, or he'll just say it "out of the blue" which seems cute?
It's a game. This guy wants to have his cake and eat it too. He's not an idiot. He knows that your not going anywhere and he can get away with this stuff.
I can't tell you what to do and have you like it or take it, but I'm pretty sure that, that's the deal with him.
I'd like to tell you that I'd break up with him, but I didn't do that. I let things get worse and let him break up with me, which, I do NOT suggest. It may be hard for you, but I think you really should find someone else, someone better... If you don't break up with him, my advice would be to at least talk to him and tell him that his jealousy and being controlling needs to stop. Don't let him take over your life because if he ever breaks up with you, it's going to SEEM impossible to start over without him....
Anyway, hope I didn't upset you, but you wanted opinions.
I sincerely wish you the best of luck!!
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this might be a tad bit hard to hear and accept.
i have a feeling he might be cheating, and he's being overly protective and controlling because he feels like it's so easy for him to cheat so you might be doing the same.
in my opinion, this isn't a good and stable relationship.
why he make up that he cheated.
i know this seems difficult, but you need to get out of this relationship.
no one deserves to be controlled, and you are allowed to have other guy friends.
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