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the truth about my breasts
This has been ruining my life. Its embarrassing, its destroying my self esteem, and I'm completely fed up with trying to hide it, yet if I flaunt it, I will be considered gross and ugly by society.
I have discolored, puffy areolas. The puffiness causes me to have a noticeable mound on my breast. I have to wear extremely padded or hard cupped bras in order to hide them, or very tight shirts/swimsuits to flatten them down.
My nipples are flat. They are not inverted, and they make no bump whatsoever. The only way you can tell that there is a nipple there is that that area is redder than the areola. Although I don't mind my nipples that much, what if I were to become intimate with someone? I know that most men will be disappointed by two red dots. And what about breastfeeding? The baby won't be able to find anything to latch on to.
When I'm cold, and I get goosebumps, it is the only time my breasts looks okay. Sure, my areolas get slightly wrinkly, and bumpy in some parts, but they look so much more attractive because they become flat and a normal color. My nipples also protrude a little bit... by maybe 2-3mm?
I am wondering if this is because my breasts are still developing? Has anyone had such problems? Did your breasts change? I know that there is surgery, but I would be very unwilling to go under the knife.
I understand that if someone that truly loves me could care less what my breasts look like, but I know I will not show them to anyone (except doctors) while they look like that.
My breasts were completely normal until I started puberty. I have seen my mom's breasts and they look normal.
Doctors have looked at them during routine check ups and never said anything about them. Only my obgyn asked me if I experienced any itching or discomfort. (she was checking me for cysts, and she found lots... all normal and deep in my breast tissue so there is no connection to them and my nipples.)
I'm turning 17 in less than a month, and although my breasts changed when I was about eleven, I got my period right on my 16th birthday, so I guess you could say I'm a late bloomer.
Its just so hard to find bras that will hide my condition. I have one bra, and I always get questions why I wear a bra when I sleep at sleepovers. I have a really hard time trying to find bikini tops, in fact, I won't go into the water all the way for fear that my top will stretch out and reveal what I've been hiding for so long.
Otherwise, I have great body image, I'm completely comfortable in my body if no one can see my condition. Please help me. I would really appreciate any input: advice, pep talk, anything. Thank you
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::Edit::
No, it really is no huge deal to me if your nipples are ugly. The point, however, that I was trying to make is that you are far more concious of how your nipples look than other people are going to be.
Hence, its NOT a huge deal, because you are a teenaged girl who like every other girl in the history of the planet, has to find something about herself to hate, and I was assuring you that no one else is going to be as obsessively neurotic as you are. That should be of some comfort.
::/edit::
On the intimacy thing, every breast looks different, and guys at least are too busy being happy that they get to see breasts to sit there and analyze what they look like.
I wouldnt be so self conscious. Theyre nipples. Its not a huge deal.
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Next time you have a check-up, you should express your concern to the doctor or your OBGYN. They don't know to help you with your nipple-esteem issue if you don't bring it up.
If there was something for them to be concerned about, they would have mentioned it by now.
As for breast feeding when the time comes, you'll be going to the OB many, many times before a baby is even born. They will tell you what you need to know. Worst case being you having to pump in order to give your baby breast milk. Now, that's worst case.
You can still bond with your child just as much with a bottle. I had to- I never had milk come in at all and had to use formula.
So don't fret over that stuff until that time comes. Right now, breast feeding is the last thing you should be stewing over.
As for guys, well, any guy I know likes breasts in general. I've never personally heard of a guy critiquing nipples. All I've heard is "Boobs! *drool* BOOBS! *more drool*"
ygs-29/f
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