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i just need help
my best friend killed himself 4 months ago. ive been literally a mess ever since. My mind is fucked up. I get soooooo sad if the littlest thing happens, and i am in a relationship right now. we've been togetehr for 5 months. he's been there for me a lot. he goes out and parties a lot, and he tries to fightwith other guys a lot.. whenever something happens, my body starts to shake incredibly, like i get the chills.. ive lost a lot of feelings in myself, like i am not ticklish anymore, have no appetite for food, every second of the day even when things are giong good i just want to die. Its too much pain, ive tried tooo hard to get better, and i did start to get there. now i am just terrible. Its not cause of my boyfriened, its just things he does and every other lilthing can do it too. anything that can possibly be bad or makes me feel like shit hits me one million times harder than a normal person.. i cantkeep giong on like this, i tried depressant pills, they fucked me up worse, i go to counceling.. its just that this is something that continously wears me down soo much physicaly and mentally.. i cant take it much longer.
idk, i need help..
any advice?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
i'm so sorry for you and your friend. i can relate only through my friend, who suffered extreme depression from family problems, but eventually pulled through and is now incredibly successful. she was focused and resilient. right now you're hurting, but it seems your boyfriend adds stress. maybe you should spend time focusing on yourself w/out having another element in your life right now. and maybe accepting the pain and tragedy and letting your emotions flow over would allow you to heal. it seems you're trying to get over it consciously, just accept it for now and let things pass. i'm sorry if this hasn't helped much, but i can assure you from hearing my friend's story that pain is manageable and life endures. people are capable of pulling out of tragic events to become someone beyond what was imgaginable. because of that, know you have the potential to pull through as well. my friend sought poetry and said it was very comforting during the time, maybe finding a new hobby would help you too. i hope i was any help, and i hope you feel better soon.
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i know exactaly how you feel, my old best friend's dad killed himself...we were EXTREMELY close. i just want to let you know, that i am here for you, right at this moment, and if you have ANY questions, or just want to vent, you can to me.
maybe you need a brake from your boyfriend, some "you" time. Just know that none of this is your fault, and at that moment your friend wasnt in the right frame of mind when he commited scuicide. Maybe you need your boyfriend more than ever right now. Either way you need to talk to him, and the people you trust most. let it out, cry, scream, punch your beanbag chair, dont keep it bottled up.
If your bf is kind of making you crazy, just simply ask him to keep it low, your not ready for the drama right now. Make sure to surround yourself in family and friends, and dont be affraid to let them help you.
Join a sport, or afterschool activity, go out on friday nights with your friends, make jokes, LAUGH and have FUN.
Take it easy though, and let yourself live, everything is going to be fine, just look at the bright side, and dont keep yourself hung up on the little things, it will be hard at first, but it can only get better. if you still feel as though in any point in your life that you want to end your life, i have some free of charge numbers you can call, all you need to do is ask. I am there for you.
It'S gOiNg To Be OkaY, yOu R oN tHe RiGhT tRaCk!!!
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