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I don't what to think of this guy and me?
ok i am a girl. i am 19 in college. So there is this guy. I met him in school and he's been really cool. He's really everything i would want, like completely, but i know he's been on and off with this girl and supposedly she's now in a relationship with this other girl. I want to say 'ya know i like you' and all but if there is something going on with this other girl i don't want to become a part of it, or make things weird for next semester. But like he's does all the things the guy i would want does and he gives me the impression he likes me back. he listens and actually remembers what i say lol and gives advice and says he thinks my friends and family sound funny and he'd have fun with them. theres lots of hugging and goofing off, but no kissing... and like he tells me all about his life, tells me to make plans for us, but then like... i invite him to things and he says he'll come and that he'd really like to but then he says he has work and i understand his schedule is really crappy and he does call and tell me his trying but this has been going on for a month. my friend thinks he has 'bonified asshole potential.'so i wonder whats going on and i know the only way to know is to ask, but like...its so hard. so how do i know he's interested like some def. signs that will help me out and give me the balls to tell him?
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having courage is very tough, my main advice to you is gaining that courage and letting him kno your feelings towards him, probably thee only way to find out, have that confidence to chase after what you want. coming from a guy we def. like girls with confidence. him being busy is something he can't help it, it sounds like he's really trying to make it to see you,(guys don't try unless they dig you) relax be cool and everything will work out!
sincerly,
michael'salvador ocampo mendoza
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He is on the rebound, and people on the rebound are notorious for confusion. On the one hand, he is enjoying your company, and his bruised ego is getting a little nudge up every time he hangs around you, but on the other, he might be holding out for someone else, which is why he doesn't follow through. If the history of their relationship has been off and on, he could be used to the breaks and just waiting for the on phase again. I would say something like this, "I like you and you're the type of guy I could have a relationship with, but I know you're sorting out some feelings about your past, and I don't want to think about where things might go between you and I until I know you have figured all of that out." If you let him know that your not interested in a relationship right now, he will be more likely to keep plans with you because he won't have to worry about what it is you're expecting. Beware-on again off again relationships go something like this. One member of the couple is dominant, and they always leave, while the other kind of waits around hoping they will come back. The one who left goes out, has a bunch of fun, and messes around with other people, while the other one kind of waits around. The minute they stop waiting around, the one who left decides they want them back. Once he starts going out with another girl, she will all of a sudden start calling and playing all of the games to get him back. She will have the advantage. She will know which buttons to push. She will say everything he wants to hear. He may or may not fall for it, yet again. Think about yourself. Have you ever let a relationship last longer than it should have, not because you really wanted to be with the guy, but because you didn't want him to be with anyone else. Have you ever broken up with a guy you really didn't want to be with, but then gotten second thoughts once you found out he was with someone else? Well, these two have gone down that road a few times, and now it is almost a predictable cycle for them.
So now, what do you do? Well, first, I'm just going on instinct here, and I could be way off. If you know someone who knows their past ask a few questions just to figure out if this is the case. Then, don't be the reason she decides to come running back. Do what you can to kind of downplay whatever it is yo have going on with him. Yo be the one to insist on taking it slow. If the two of you get together, predict her next move. Tell him she will be coming back, and then tell him she will be leaving again once you have gone. Talk to him about it like a friend. Tell him that even if he doesn't get with you, you would rather see him with someone who truly cares about him and doesn't think she can throw him away, and then take him back every time he finally crawls out of the dumpster.
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