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I have speech problems


Question Posted Monday December 10 2007, 9:50 pm

I have a tough time carrying on conversations people think im boring or a bitch becasue i ignore them but its only because i can never find anything interesting to say. Whenever its me and two others we atart off aconversation together then it ends up being the other two people talking and me zoning out i say stupid stuff irrelevant stuff nothing good how can i get over being nervous and carry on a convo

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ciao77 answered Tuesday December 11 2007, 2:23 pm:
I know how you feel. Sometimes you don't have anything to say, and feel obliged to say something, ANYTHING, so you end up saying irrelevant things. I get caught in these situations too sometimes. For starters, don't beat yourself up. The more self-conscious you are about it, the more tense you become. In that case, it will be very hard to carry on a conversation. The best thing you can do is relax and be yourself. You don't have to comment on each and every thing you hear, but when you have something to say, speak up.
I know what you mean about two other people talking and you feeling left out. Sometimes when two other people "click," or have a lot to say, the third person feels almost like the third wheel. In these situations, try to follow along with what the others are talking about, and join the conversation. But do not feel obligated to say something, cause then you will become self-conscious and will not know what to say (almost like being nervous for a job interview). It might sound easier than it really is, but being yourself is the key. Also, don't feel like your comments and opinions are useless and dumb- it may all be in your head.
Also, when you are talking to someone, focus only on what he or she is saying. Don't dwell on what your next comment will be, what you will say next. Communication is two-way. So in order to be a good speaker, you have to also be a good listener. When someone is talking, listen to what they say. Don't just think about what you should say next...if you listen and don't ignore the other person, you will be a lot more likely to have something to say to them, and to carry on the conversation.
If you have any other questions, or need any advice, message me

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crysathen answered Tuesday December 11 2007, 4:21 am:
I totally understand you on this one! In my experience the best way to work on your conversation skill is to have more conversation. Small-talk is a good way to start! When you're at the grocery store talk to the clerk. Sounds hard, but all you have to throw out is a short "How's your day going?", etc. You'll often find that people perk up and have something to say. (Start small and work your way up!) Chatting online isn't the worst idea, either. It certainly helps to practice conversation skill when the person isn't standing right in front of you. Hope that helped some!

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