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Best friend likes me but wont take a chance
Ok, here goes. A new guy (8 months ago) started hanging around with me and my friends. We are a very tight group and have been friends for 13 years. We are actually more like family. He was accepted into out "core" group really quickly which is rare.He constantly says he has never had friends like us before....friends that would do anything for each other. Him and I have gotten very close and up until a week ago spent almost all of our time together. We have a different bond than all the rest of out "group". I started having romantic feelings for him about 4 months ago. We flirt all the time and it so obvious to everyone else that we like/liked each other more than friends. One night I told him how I felt and he said he felt the same but if we didnt work out he knew that our group of friends would kick him out because we have been friends so long. He also said he needed to find himself and that he was scared. He wasnt ready to date and dosent really know how.Hes only been in two relaionships both long term (hes 26). I said ok and I could tell it hurt him to tell me that. I thought he was lying and just didnt want to date me but he told all our other friends the same things and that I am the most awesome person he has ever met. That he has to just keep telling himself I am not an option but sometimes it takes all his stregnth not to just kiss me and when Im not around that he misses me. He says he knows if we dated he would mess something up. He is still flirty but I just recently found out he has started dating(two weeks ago). He didnt want to tell me that and he still hasnt actually told me. Out other friends did. He has never even brought it up to me although he knows I know. I am heartsick over him cause I know he still feels the same. It just feels like we were meant to be together. What can I do I am going crazy? I dont know what to do if he actually brings around some of the women he is dating. Help!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I guess, to be perfectly honest, he values the friends more than he wants to risk them turning on him someday.
It may also be he is telling all of them about feeling as he does to keep them from rejecting him for rejecting you.
I know, not what you wanted to hear. But if he cared about you enough to think there might be
a future, what the friends reaction to a break-up might be wouldn't stop him.
This may be a relationship destined to be a good friendship. If you want to put it to the test, keep your distance from the group for a while. See how much he really misses you. If there are true feelings there, that should bring him running.
Good luck. Hope it works out. :)
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wow. thats really rough. so you said that if you two got together then your friends would kick him out of their circle?? ok. i know you may not want to hear this...but who cares? i mean, if they don't want you to be with the guy you like that likes you back then they are not your real friends. they should be getting you two together. see i honestly don't care what my friends think of my boyfriend. and you can tell them that if they cannot except him then they arent worth it. he, on the other hand, he is so worth it. i might be a little naive because im not in your position, but thats just my advice. hope it helps. and as for these girls hes dating? try to befriend them. although thats not what i would do. i'd tell them to screw off. that hes yours, not theirs. you dont have to take my advice on that one though. take care! :)
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