|
woth is?
Hey!, I'm Ashley. I'm 16.
i've known my this boy Henry for almost three years. He is friends with some of my best guy friends. We flirted on and off for about two years but never went out because we hardly saw each other. This past summer Henry started hanging out with my neighbor and best friend Ryan who i've known my entire life. This put him closer and we saw each other more and more. Then he asked me out and we were dating for two and a half months. we recently took a break but now we both want to get back together but Ryan now likes me as more than a friend and is jealous of Henry. When ever he can he tries to separate us, and tells me lies about Henry. He advises me not to take him back. I only see Ryan as a friend so I don't have feelings for him but I don't want to lose him either. I feel that he will get very angry is Henry and I start up again as a couple. I don't know what to do.. advice please? :)
thanks so much-
Ashley
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Hi Ashley.
I think to be totally honest in some ways you've already lost Ryan as a friend at least in the sense of what he was before because he is lying to you about things and such in the hopes you will now go out with him instead of get back together with Henry.
I think firstly you, and no-one, should have to choose between a friendship and the person they want to be with purely over jealousy - which is what this is. If you really do like Henry and want to get back together with him then i think you should do. At the end of the day if you don't just because you're afraid how Ryan will feel or react you are giving into his tantrum and in effect putting your own life on hold simply because he cannot accept the truth. You shouldn't have to do this especially since you only see him as a friend. Talk to him and tell him you only see him as a friend and nothing more. If you are going to get back with Henry then dont lie to him and then let him decide what he wants to do from there. It might just be it's painful for him to see you with Henry in which case just give him some time and he will soon get over it.
Under no circumstances though should you not do what you want to do simply because you don't want to make Ryan angry or mad at you. He is being manipulative by using his friendship with you to sway your decision on what to do when it comes to Henry (like him saying not to take him back). If Henry had treated you bad or just dumped you out the blue and such i can understand why he may not like you seeing him again but if none of this is the case then his opinions on what you should do are simply biased.
Good luck.
]
i think that you should tell ryan that you dont think of him that way. also explain to him that you like Henry and thay he needs to leave you guys alone. tell him you dont want to lose him as a friend, but he cant do that
]
hello darling,
i think that on this one you really should just follow your hear. just explain to ryan that you see him as more of a brother and not a boy friend. if he really cares about your friendship then he'll understand. but if you getting back together with henry would ruin your friendship with ryan you might wanna think about it. which is worth more. a boyfriend or a friendship? but i think if ryan is really your friend and cares about you, he'll totally understand.
-violet shroom
]
More Questions: |