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Stabbing fantasies
I'm 16/f. I get angry very very easily about the tiniest of things.
A guy friend of mine has a habit of vandalising peoples things as a joke when they leave there desk. I knew he would look through my wallet of take something as a joke when I went to leave the room so I took it with me.
Anyway, when I came back I found he had drawn all over my school diary. It made me really angry. Another close guy friend of mine was sitting between us two. He said I looked like I was going to kill him. Anyway I took a sharp compass out of my pencil case and pretended to whipser into the ear of the guy who was sitting next to me. The other boy who drew on my stuff leaned over to lister and as he did so I violently lunged at him and stabbed him with the compass. He bled for about half an hour and he was in a lot of pain. Whenever I get really angry I have fantasies about stabbing the person who did it to me and I have a history of self-cutting. Today when I stabbed that boy I felt so good. it was one of the best feelings I've ever had. It released all my anger and hate and the boy is now incredibly scared of me. Is this normal? I don't think it is. And now that I have had a taste of stabbing someone I want to keep doing it and I don't think I can stop.
=| Should I be worried?
Help??
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
No this is not normal. I would seriously advise that you get yourself some professional help. This is for your own good, as well as the people around you. Do it before you either end up seriously injuring/ killing someone (and ending up in jail for it), or before you meet someone who will actually retaliate.
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I think you should be worried that your anger is getting out of control.
The best solution would be anger management councelling, obviously, but a lot of people who have difficulty with excessive anger find that finding an outlet activity can help...
So if you absolutely can't afford councelling I would suggest taking up maybe a sport or something to let out your energy in.
I really think that councelling would help you though, especially with a history of self harming, so please try to get some.
Good luck. xxx
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