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stick with the old or try something new!
Okay, so me and this guy that i really like named matt have been going out since 5th grade (im going to 9th grade) but on and off.. i really think we are like soul mates. but i met this guy thats going to be a senior this summer and i really like him. me and matt just started going out a few weeks ago after hating each other for a few mounths. this always happens, we break up and hate each other and then af ew mounths later we get back together. so right now we're 'in love' and stuff. but today matt was being rude to me.. and he kept hanging up on me and then didn't call back.. and hung out with his friends instead of hanging out with me, and im sick so he was supposed to come to my house. but i told the senior about it and he said that matt was only using me to 'get in between my legs' and so on.. he says i should break up with him and not wait but i really dont know what to do.. i mean i really like teh Senior, but then again i love matt.. but me and matt have been on and off for a long time.. and im wondering if i should try something new.. i've never been with a guy that much older than me but i kind of want to try!..help??
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Hi,
Since you said that you and Matt have been going out on and off, there must be a reason that you keep separating. I know you feel that he is your soul mate, but that could be just because he is your first love. You don't have anything to compare it to. If he really was your soul mate, he wouldn't be rude to you. He would be more caring about your feelings. There is a saying that goes something like this, "No man is worth crying over, and the one that is won't make you cry." It's cliche, but it's true. I'm not saying that Matt is a bad person or that you can't get along with him, but maybe your relationship is better for friendship. Sometimes being to intimate changes a good relationship for the worse.
As for the senior saying that Matt just wants to "get in between your legs," that might or might not be true. I don't know enough about him to say. But I just think he is rude to you, and you shouldn't have to put up with him being nice to you only sometimes. Even though you enjoy the parts when your relationship is good, know that it is better with someone who is nice all the time. You can't get into a relationship like that if you don't break it off with Matt.
About going out with a senior, if you do decide to end your relationship with Matt, give yourself a little time to get over him before you jump into another relationship. Plus, you'll have time for yourself for a little bit!
There's one other thing you should think about. That's ages. I feel that it doesn't matter what your age is, it is maturity and how you feel about each other. But, there is a little formula that says how to figure out if someone is too old for you. You divide the older person's age by two, and add seven. That is the minimum age a person should be to go out with them. Another thing you should think about too. Is the senior 18? If he is, it is illegal to have a romantic relationship with him.
This was a little long, but I hope it helps you! If you have any other questions, don't hestiate to write back! :)
Best wishes,
Hannah
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Ok now I know you may not want to hear this, but both of them are not for you.
Matt- I don't think he is using you, but if he truely loves you, he wouldn't be hating you for a few months... he would want to be with you every second. So If both of you are always breaking up and then making up, well thats not a good relationship and you can do better than that.
Senior dude- take my advice, stick with guys your age... because if you go out with people older or younger than you, it can turn out disguisting and bad. I've heard of a lot of people who think it's fine to go out with people that are 4 years older than them... but then they end up getting hurt.
Try to find a guy who is around your age and who will always be there for you and not breaking up and making up all the time.
I hope I helped!
-volleyball2150
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