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Being ditched...
16/f. I've been best friends with this guy for 4 years. Except for literally DAYS of being attracted to him when we first met, months before we were even friends (which wasn't reciprocated), everything between us has always been 100% platonic, and we've both had several bfs/gfs during the course of our friendship. However, for ages because of how close we are other people have been speculating there's something more. Recently he got this new girlfriend, and he has been spending ALL his time for her, and he never sees me anymore unless she can come along and even that's barely ever. He didn't come to my party because he was with her! It's driving me insane and I keep trying to talk to him about it, but he keeps implying that I'm just jealous of her cos I'm in love with him or something, which is ridiculous because I have a boyfriend myself. I really don't want to lose our friendship... what should I do? Is it ACTUALLY impossible to only be platonic friends with a guy with no one saying anything?!
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To be quite honest I think your friend is whipped. He may be letting his girlfriend control the relationship. It is possible to have a friendship with a guy and not be attracted to him... but if you hang out almost 24-7...someone always says something and rumors get spread. I think since he won't listen to you write him a letter and tell him what you're thinking. You just want to be friends nothing more, your not "in love with him" you just dont want to lose the friendship. You want to make it work. And if he is the one saying all this "jealousy" mumbojumbo then I don't think he's as great a friend as he seemed to be. If one girl could make him ruin a great friendship then maybe you should just go your seperate ways. I do hope that you two can be friends and that he will listen to you when you speak instead of letting his girlfriends words or his ego get the best of him.
I hope that all works out...
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It might not be him, it could be his girlfriend who absolutely refuses to allow him to have female friends. And if that is the case, it is not likely that he will admit it to anyone because they will make fun of him. Just give him his space. Let him find out what it is like to loose contact with his friends. It is a lesson that he needs to learn and you are preventing him from learning it. He needs to feel the pain and/or lonliness of not haveing contact with people who love him just for him. He'll come around. Being young is all about learning all about relationships. Loving ones and platonic ones.
Good luck to you dear.
Michele
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