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Leave or Stay?
I used to be best friends with this guy, he's 16/m, I'm 16/f. Anyway, we got romantic one night (not sex) and nothing's been the same since. It's been 8 months, and I was hoping the friendship would gradually get better. It's gotten worse, I barely know him anymore, he lies, I give 100% effort in this friendship, and he gievs maybe 4%. I told him when we were BEST friends that I would never give up on him, and that I didn't ditch people. I'd love to keep my promise, but quite frankly people I feel like completely blowing him off & never speaking to him again. I think it's because I've had it & feel like I have nothing left to give.
Question is, do you think blowing him off/cutting all contact with him is a good idea? If not, why? If yes, how should I go about that? (we have this thing where he calls once a week & i call once a week to check in) Thing is, I still want to do the friendly "hi" in the hallway when I see him at school, I just don't want to talk to him outside of school. ANY ADVICE? please. hellllp.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
I personally think you should TRY to stay, but if nothing works, then leave.
What you need to do is call him, and invite him over. If he wants to meet up somewhere, cool, do that too. But whether you're meeting up somewhere or going to each other's houses, a serious talk needs to take place. Talk to him about the friendship, the situation about what happened 8 months ago, if there's a way to fix this & how, or what to do if nothing works. Tell him you're sick of putting all the effort in & him putting in hardly any. Friendship is a two way street, it takes effort from both people. Lucky for you, you know that. =)
Anyways, if he just completely doesn't listen to you during that talk, or he has nothing to say, just say "I think we're better off as acquaintances, and I'd like to say hi every once and a while inside school, but I want nothing to do with you outside of school. I'm sick of being the only one who wants this friendship to work, so I'm done." Then get up & walk away. If he really cares & wants a way to save the friendship, he'll come after you & sit you down to talk again. I hope all goes well.
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you dont have to cut off all contact with him. but if he isnt putting any effort at all into being a good friend for you then maybe he needs a little time away from you to see that he still cares about you (as a friend).dont call him every week like you usually do. maybe skip a week and see if he says anything to you about it. if he does then maybe he isnt really trying to blow you off. maybe he is really busy or has been stressed out latley. if he doesnt mention the skipped phone call then dont call him for awhile. you can still talk at school but dont try to make any plans with him outside of school if he doesnt shape up.
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