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wants to have sex but never wants to talk
16/f
I dated this boy on and off for 2 years. It took us that long to realize that we basically should't be in a tied down relationship. We developed what we call being "close friends". Basically, friends with benefits. But sweet stuff too, not just sex, sex, sex.
Well for the past month or two he's just been so blah. He wants to have sex everytime he sees me. But he never wants to talk before the fact. And I just realized that we never actually have a conversation on the phone. We're always either just silent, or saying boring things, or he just doesn't wanna get on the phone with me. And now I'm just like, wow, our "relationship" kinda sucks.
I talked to him about it but he doesn't understand. He thinks we can just chill together. And not talk.
But I'm like.. listen, if we're gonna have sex, we're gonna have conversations.
How do I make communication better? Or do you think he's just into the sex and doesn't wanna talk?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Basically, similar answer to the person below me.
He probably doesnt realize hes "using you" but that is in essence what hes doing.
The relationship has stagnated. Unfortunately for you, its stagnated in a direction hes fine with. Hes not interested in being tied down or mature enough to really handle a relationship, but he still thinks youre a relatively cool person and obviously doesnt want to give up sex.
Its probably not going to change. If youre happy with a relationship on his terms, then go with it.
If you arent, end it.
But the person below was doubly right that if you want a decent relationship and you hold out, you're probably just going to get hurt.
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I think he's just in it for the sex. I, personally, don't think being friends with benefits is such a great idea, anyway. Lose the "close relationship" and just be regular friends. I don't think there's anyway to make people communicate better, especially from what he sounds like. You know the relationship sucks, and you've tried talking to him about this. It doesn't sound like anythings getting through to him. Good luck!
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