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How seriously I should take something said when drunk
I recently got back together with my boyfriend after a two week break. Out of curiosity, I flipped through his phone. He had mentioned considering hooking up with some one to see if his feelings for me were strong enough to allow him to or not. This, of course, entailed only a kiss according to him. Nothing further than that. As much as the information hurt, I understood that it could be indicator of whether or not his feelings for me were genuine.
On his phone he had engaged in a text conversation with a girl-friend, a day after we had agreed to stop talking for a while. In it, he was asking to hook up with her just "for pleasure," and "no strings attached," and telling her he had "obviously always been attracted to her." The messages included nothing about "wanting to kiss her to see what it felt like" in regards to me. He claimed to have asserted he did not want sex, and that she had initiated the suggestion of hooking up in the first place. He begged me to believe he had never wanted to say the things he did, and that he had been drunk and high that night when he said them, claiming to have not remembered them in the morning. He also claimed to have no feelings for her whatever while sober; even so much as dislike her. He also said he would have never gone through with it while sober, because it would have felt wrong for him. What I want to know is: should I believe the alcohol could make him behave that way? We recently got back together, and had two perfect and romantic days in a row. When we first kissed again, he told me he loved me with tears in his eyes. I know his feelings are strong and genuine. Should I forgive him for that conversation? Or is it something I should pay attention to?
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"Two perfect and romantic days in a row"
You are putting way too much emphasis on a short and minor relationship.
Date him if you want to. But keep in mind that this is not a serious long term committed relationship, and you two dont sound old enough to even really understand what that entails.
Have fun, try not to get hurt, and be ready to dump him. I mean, its not like youre going to end up marrying some guy from the end of middle school/beginning of high school.
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Um... Yeah. That's a big red flag, dearest.
You know what bother's me more than the prospect that he might be lying to you? What bothers me is his excuse: he was high and drunk. Do you really want to be with someone that allows themself to get that wasted? And do you really want to be with someone that uses their inebriated state to excuse inappropriate and hurtful behavior?
I would suggest that you pay attention. Honestly, I'm hoping you dump this guy. To me it doesn't sound like he deserves you.
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You definetly need to pay attention to this or it could happen again. Often times when guys say they wanna test how they feel for a girl it means they want to have sex with other people with an excuse. Alcohol often makes true thoughts come out from your subconciouse and people say things that they are trying to hold back so there's a good chance your boyfriend wanted to hook up with her, got drunk and tryed hooking up with her. He sounds like an ass to me dear and you can do so much better:) Good wishes to you dear:)
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