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Confused about romantic feelings for a friend
Hi, I am a 22 year old Canadian pre-op FTM transman and I am confused about my feelings for a friend of mine.
This friend and I have been close for a long time and I find myself feeling romantically attracted to her and mostly physically attracted to her accept for one thing. I will explain my dilemma now.
She is also a transexual only she is a pre-op MTF(male to female) which means she hasn't had bottom surgery yet, making her penis a vagina. I consider myself a straight male in a female body and therefore am not attracted to penis'. She knows this and is ok with it, but I find myself unsure of what to do.
I am attracted to her emotionally, but not so much physically because of that.
We slept together once and it was ok. I was nervous so it didn't go as well as it could, but then I said that maybe we should hold off because I realized I wasn't into BDSM like she was, but I have that issue figured out. She is fine with that. We communicate everything before hand.
I don't want to keep changing my mind because I feel like I am using her, even though she keeps telling me I wouldn't be. I don't want to keep changing my mind, but I am unsure of how to persu my feelings.
Should I leave it at friendship? or should I keep trying more on an expiremental basis until we both know what we want? what I want?
I don't know.
Advice would be great!
Thank you.
-Nathan
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wow this would be very confusing to someone. keep seeing her and your attraction to her emotionally may turn into something physical. it sounds like you two could relate to each other well.
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in this case you to balance each other out in many was if i was in your shoes i would go for it
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My, my this is quite a predicament.
I think that perhaps you should share the fact that you find her penis a little bit of a problem.
I am assuming that as you are using the term pre-op for both of you that you will both be having realignment surgery at some point in the future.
I understand that it must be difficult for both of you to resist the temptation of having sex as you are both obviously very attracted to one another emotionally and are sharing this experience however, I would suggest that you both try to hold off on having sex until both of you have had surgery and can re-evaluate how you feel. It may be that you have already found your soulmate however, there is a small chance that you havn't and all this to-ing and fro-ing on whether or not to have sexual relations with one another could end up with both of you losing a very very very good and dear friend.
I hope this helped.
Take Care!
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