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good or bad friend
so i got my best friend or i think so, lets call him bill. anyway hes really competitive with me like in skateboarding if he lands a trick i cant do hes always talking about it and wanting to go skating. When i was way better than him he didnt want to go. i know this other guy who we will call john. he skates to. i just metioned to bill that i went to johns house for a sleepover and we skated. john was having a party and he invited me first. i didnt tell or boast to bill. then when bill was invited he came straight up to me and asked was i invited to johns party. now john is always boasting about how hes going to johns house to swim and skate. i know its pathetic. then bill said john was makin fun of my skatin on aim. also when i was a fridget he kept on telling other people in our new school and girls. when infact i found out he was ne too. later somehow everyone knew who i had kissed and apparently she was a real minger. i kept all his secrets but he spreads bullshit about me. also when wer talking to girls he blocks me out and when i speak he speaks over me. same on aim. hes really my best friend though and wer tight but hes got these bad qualities. should i just ignore him or like do what?
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It sounds like Bill has a little bit of a jealous streak in him. That's pretty normal at your age. Everyone goes through phases like this at some point or another, and he will most likely grow out of it. You, as the more mature one, should set an example on how to behave.
When brags about being invited to a party, or kissing a girl, just act like your happy for him and move on. Simply say, "Oh, that's cool" or something to that extent. When he figures out that it doesn't bother you, he will stop doing it. When he gets a new trick at the skatepark, act happy for him. Congratulate him before he has a chance to brag about it.
Don't let him push you around. When your talking to girls, you should initiate the conversation. Be bold and don't take anything from him. If he starts to push you out of the conversation, say something like "You know man girls don't like that" right in front of them. Then just laugh and roll your eyes. It will embarass him a little bit, and you will be knocking him down a notch.
Girls like confident guys. They will also recognize Bill's pushy-ness and they won't like that. (Trust me, I've had a few years experiece being a girl ;-) If you stay calm and act like he's just dumb, everything will pan out better for you in the end.
Good Luck!
Sarah
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Every friend that you're going to have in your life, is going to have some bad qualities. No one is perfect. So you're either going to have to dump Bill as a friend, or learn to live with his bad qualities.
For the most part, Bill sounds like he wants to be your friend. I actually think, that he might be a little jealous of you. Maybe he is jealous that you have more friends/ are more like-able. After all, you do have John. Maybe Bill was feeling a little left out when you hung out with John. There are tons of reasons why he could be jealous of you. Or he could simply be taking his anger out on you. This might be why he spreads secrets/lies about you.
As for the part about him ignoring you when he's with girls, totally normal! It's completely normal for a guy to occasionally ditch his friends for a girl. Even if he does that sometimes, it doesn't mean you're not friends. You still are.
My advice would be to talk to Bill about this. You don't have to make it mushy or anything. Just say, "Hey, what's up with you spreading rumors or saying bad things about me?" You have to let Bill know that you want to be his friend, but you have to TRUST him not to be talking about you behind your back. Tell Bill he's a great friend, but it really annoys you when he says those things about you.
Problems will come and go with friends. You can't expect any one to be perfect. Talk to Bill, but after that, Just try to ignore his bad behavior as much as you can. He'll eventually come around.
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well think of it this way: would a real friend talk about you behind ure back& put you down? hmm also when you both are talking to girls dont just let him push you out of the way: push him back: girls love guys fighting :) but dont take it too seriously: but yah gotta get in that action somehow :)
hope i helped! :)
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