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trust
I stayed with a woman I met while she was on holiday. Into the second week, I had a visit from two of my male friends, and after dinner we all retired to have a drink. I went to bed early but the woman stayed back chatting to the guys. Later I found out that under the influence of liquor she had oral sex with the guys. She was drunk enough to be free of her inhibitions but not too drunk to know what was going on.
She did not say what happened but I got to know through reliable source and when confronted, admitted. What was significant was up to that time she was even happy to get pregnant with me and have a baby. However, I do not think she is an ideal mother.
She does have her own share of her family problems, both parents being divorced and re-married but her relationship to her father and step mother is at a very low ebb.
She feels that her father has let her down by not supporting her at any point of her life.
Her behaviour is inconsistent and unstable for a good relationship, and she constantly remind of the 20 year age gap we have although first she said it is unimportant as she finds me attractive intelligent and charming. She is also aware that I have numerous affairs.
However, I also get the feeling that she is looking to find more men although she feels she has a lesser success than me.
Sex between us is fabulous, first rate but we do have frequent arguments. She expects me to agree to her version of mild explanation on morality and on what took place and at best is very inconsistent when it comes to such a issues.
My question is can I trust her not to behave like that or consume heavy alcohol which may impair her judgement.
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Hey, well i totally disagree with you on the judging her from her past and her family. My parents divorced when i was younger as well. My biological mother got remarried and i currently live with my biological mother and my new stepdad. My biological father never got remarried and hes not in the picture anymore due to the abuse that i suffered from him. Anyways, bascially what im saying is, give her a chance. Just because of her past problems and bad relationships DOES NOT make her a bad person as well. Just because my dad used to abuse me -- does that mean that im going to abuse my childen? No, definately not. As for her parenting skills, that seems iffy for me. She doesnt seem mature enough to handle a child right now. But wait a minute, she could prove me wrong and treat that child like gold. What i would do is give her a chance to prove to you that she can be a decent parent, because what has she done to you to make you KNOW that she couldnt handle having a kid? Nothing. She may have some bad behaviors, but maybe reality will shock her into changing her ways for her child.
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First, I dont think you should blame her past on the situation. Both my parents are devorced and my biological dad was never in the picture, thank god for adoption. My biological mom hasbeen in and out of relationships like it's cool and has been married three times.
But when i found the right guy what my parents had put me through or what had happened in my past with them was erased and i started to rewrite my past and furture.
If she alread got out of control once with alcohol, there is no saying wether or not she's not going to do it again. Unless she really does regret the past and what she's done. Even then you cant be sure.
PS. i deffinetly dont think she's ready to be a mother, if she cant keep true to a commitment, how is she suppose to stay true to 9 months od pregnancy and 18 years of rasing a child?
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