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humorist-workshop
Things to do with people?
I wasn't very social during the school year,so I'm trying to work my way back into.I REALLY want to get with people,but I just don't know what to do in a social situation anymore.I'm worried that if it's one on one we'll just be sitting in awkward silence like idiots,and if it's with a group I'll be the weird quiet kid dragging along in the back.I just want to know how to keep things moving and how to prevent dull moments.Basically,I just want to know what to do when I hang out with people.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Random Weirdos?
Some people are blessed with a natural ability to make small talk, and can strike up a conversation with anyone, any time. But for most people, it's a skill that has to be developed with time and practice. So don't feel like there's anything "weird" about you... just jump in and start doing it, and it will eventually become easier!
It might help to sit down and make a list of "conversation starters"... things you can say if there's ever an awkward silence. The best way to start a conversation is to ask questions about something the other person is interested in. People love to talk about themselves! So think of questions that will get people to open up and start talking.
Keep in mind that you don't have to be "the life of the party" in order to fit in and have fun in a social situation. Yes, there are some people who always have something funny or interesting to say... but for every talker, there also has to be a listener. If you aren't the person who's doing the talking, you can be the person that people want to talk TO, by showing a genuine interest in what they are saying.
Don't think that you have to be dazzlingly witty for people to like you. If you show an interest in other people, they will automatically become interested in you.
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Hang out with people who share your interests. That'll inspire you to add to the conversation and share your opinions with them. If you like reading, join a book club. If you like sports, join a team. If you like music, consider getting a job at a music store. If you like movies, think about working at a cinema. If you like animals, volunteer at your local animal shelter. And so on...
There's numerous ways to get to be near people who share your interests. It may take you some time to start interacting socially, but that's OK. You haven't been very social lately and getting back into the scene isn't going to be an overnight transition. It's gonna take some time and patience, but you can definitely do it. More than likely, nobody knows you're not confident, so just fake it.
You need to change the way you think about how people are interpreting you. Unless you know for a fact, you shouldn't assume they're thinking of you badly. And even if they do think of you badly, so what? Who cares? There'll be tons of other people who think you're cool. Finally, just because you don't talk a lot doesn't mean you're weird or quiet. Some people would interpret that as you listening, which is a good quality in a friend. :)
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