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how do i tell him??? sorry this is long
Well I am kinda seeing someone long distance ( havent really made it offical) but it has been iffy since he hasnt come to my town yet.( we live 2 hrs apartWell Last week I was mentioned online to everyone what I wanted to go out on the lake for memorial Day and whoever wanted to come was invited. I was shocked hearing from him saying that he might come up for it since he was going to only be an hour away that day. I was not going to get my hopes up till that day just in case there was any cancellations on his part. Well He showed up at the right time and went creek hopping ( hiking along the creek) all day. I found it quite funny because he had never been there but was up to going on up ahead to make the trail and rocks were safe enough for the rest of us to get across. We sorta made him our guide that in reality never been there. later After I took everyone else home we went out to eat and then walked down my main st. Showed him my high school and stuff like that. we talked forever and he even took my hand which I thought was funny. Then I took him back to his car and we ended up talking for 3 hours (well mostly talking).about everything To government(which I never really talk about) to childhood memories. one point we were talking about goals in life. he asked me what I wanted to do with my life. I am still not completely sure. which is what I said. and he said kinda jokingly I could always come and keep him company in Sacramento. I just laughed out loud and said “funny" and then later on he made the comment again little bit more serious adding" Like I said before you can always come stay with me.. there are lots of job opportunities up there and my rent is only this much etc. To let him be at ease I told him I would keep him in mind. I don’t know if I were to do something like that. I never lived with anyone besides my own family. Plus I don’t know if he would be able to handle the kind of relationship I want. I am the kind of person waiting for marriage if you know what I mean.( my own personal standards not religious standards) And I think it would drive him nuts that I wouldn’t be wanting to go that far because it is only a one bedroom apt. He doesn’t know about my standards which I know I need to discuss with him before he make suggestions like that before he can handle it. The next time I am going to see him is next week at the club we met him at for my friend's birthday. found it quite funny before because my friend told me before when I was a little hurt by him to not tell him about her birthday thing at the club. So I didn’t. But one of the first things she tells him to come to her party at the club. I was sitting right there too. it made me scratch my head like "what??" I asked that to her tonight, and she said " Oh I got over that after he made the effort to come up here and plus I invited him for you" and my friend is not young either. she is 36 but great fun to be around. Just makes me wonder some time. So if he does bring it up again( like at the party) How do you think is the best way to put it? it is a tricky topic to discuss don’t you think? please help me
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im not going to go into detail like most ppl do im just going to keep it real;
The next time he asks you just say that i wouldn't mind staying with you i just have standards i would really like to wait until im married before we do "you know" since you have a one bedroom apt. you can see that i have a reason to explain this to you and keep the conversation going from there.
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yes this one is a bit tricky but I will give it a shot.
Seems to me you wouldn't mind living with him and getting a chance to stay somewhere else but the 1 bedroom thing is a problem if it is a problem for you do not change that. Perhaps you could get a 1 bedroom apt. near him and see each other if that is what you want and you could have a friend nearby. The best way to tell him is to wait till he mentions it again or say were you serious about moving in together. If he says yes tell him that you would love to (thats if you would) but with him only having 1 bedroom that is a problem. If he asks why you have opened the door to explain to him that you need your own bedroom because you are waiting till marriage or whatever it is nothing against him just a personal standard that you have set for yourself.If you do not want to change your standards DON"T move in once you are there in his apartment he will try to change your standards for you. If he cannot accept this move on to someone that does respect your wishes. I applaud you for waiting, keep it up do not let anyone change your mind about waiting and do not lead him on that things will change if they won't they just won't. Good Luck :-)
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