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is it my problem
17f,
ok heres the dealo i did stuff with these 2 guys that i work with and they all and were with somebody i didnt fuck them but i did on the other hand give them a hand job and one of them fingered me and felt up my boobs and i felt really sluty and bad one of the guys i use to care for and the other one i really care for still and the one that i use to like i only done a hand job once!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but i knew what i was doing so my question is why do i only do stuff with people who are with other people when i myself doesnt want it get hurt and thinks its wrong to cheat on other pple but i allow them to cheat on there gurlfriends with little virgin me why im not in a relationship because when asked i just cant bring myself to say yes and well im really not all that confidence and im jeleous and i hide that pretty well so why do i fall for the people who i know cant offer me nothing and than i feel sluty and alone and i pray that nobody does it to me i know im not a slut cause im still a virgin but help me please what is wrong with me thanks advice highly needed
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I'm not sure why you do it - only you can really know the reason behind that but at a guess I would think it's the whole knowing that they have someone else but that you can also have them and make them cheat on their girlfriends (the whole jealousy thing). This is only a guess but as I said, only you yourself know the true reasons behind it.
I will say this though -either of these guys are NOT guys you want to be getting involved with even if they say they will dump who their with for you because like you said about someone doing the same to you, they will ore than likely do the exact same to you. No matter how much a guy says they will change - there's a big chance they they just won't.
First thing you need to do is put a stop to this stuff with these two guys - they don't deserve someone like you at all. They don't even deserve the girlfriends they are with now let alone you.
As for you, I don't think that you're a bad person at heart. You know what you're doing is wrong but you're letting this jealousy and envy get the better of you. This will be the first thing you need to control and stop. In my opinion there's nothing wrong with someone who is shy (lack of confidence usually implies the person is shy) and to be honest I find it kind of sweet.
Don't think that you'll be alone either. You are obviously a really nice person deep down and someone who obviously knows what she is doing is wrong. You just need to lay your jealousy to rest so you can let what you're really like out. Guys will come along too. Some may be jerks but there will be that special one that will be deserving of you and vice-versa but it's just a matter of being patient.
Being attracted to guys who are taken is not a sin because that happens to everyone but you DO need to know where to draw the line and leave it at that crushing and nothing more. You just need to be able to say no to them. More so that they are with someone. If they want to dump who they are with just to be with you then youll need to ask yourself how long will it be before another girl comes along and he does the same with you. That's why guys like that are just best avoided (unreliable guys who have no clue what they want or who they like). We all feel alone though (I've been single just over 2 years now so imagine how I must feel) but just be patient - that special guy will come along.:] Like I said, you are obviously a really niceperson so you've a lot going for you, it's just a matter of being patient and not letting jealousy run your life and ruin who you really are.
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