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a "friend" ! UGH
okay. this is going to get confusing.
i had this friend, friend one. she used to be like my best friend & we were really close in 6th grade.
well in 7th grade, me & this other girl friend two got in a fight. & then friend one became best friends with friend two & i got REALLY pissed at friend one. like who does that?! who goes & becomes BEST FRIENDS with your best friend's enemy. like honestly.
so i stopped going on aim & all this stuff & i still talk to friend one you know? like i smile at her in the hallways & stuff. but i am still really mad at her.
so yesterday i was really bored & stuff so i went on aim, you know? and i talked to her for a long time. and i still kept my space with what i told her. but like she acts like everything is perfectly fine & she talks about friend two like we're still friends. & it gets me really mad cause she's so ignorant to the truth!
i've considered saying sorry to friend two loads of times, but then i think, "what's the point? she chose to lose ME as a friend - i didn't chose to lose her. it's her loss." so i still like deal with it. but friend one still thinks we're like BFFAE when i am so mad at her!
can someone give me some advice?! i've already tried talking to friend one a few times but she just gets mad at me. i told her exactly how i felt & she was like, oh well... me and friend two are still friends. & i was like maybe we shouldnt be best friends anymore & stuff but she JUST DOESNT GET IT.
for now i'm just like ignoring her & saying hi to her in the hallway if she says hi to me but it's just so stupid of me to keep doing this!
can someone please help me?!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
For friend one, she's obviously not a real friend if she ditched you for friend two, even though she KNEW you guys had been fighting. It's like a best friend thing that you don't do that. Usually, a best friend will gang up on the bitch that has a problem with one of you. It's like a code, if you will. Every girl knows of it. Either she wasn't informed, isn't too bright, or just doesn't get it all together. If you're mad at her, don't say hi to her anymore. It makes no sense. When I'm mad at somebody, I cut them off completely. I stop talking to them, delete them off of my MySpace, whatever it takes. Once they piss me off, or prove they can't handle being trusted, they're officially dead to me, and there is no forgiveness. It's that simple.
If she doesn't get that you don't wanna be friends anymore, maybe you're being too nice about it. I mean, yes, you don't wanna hurt her feelings, but you also wanna get your point across to her so that she gets it. You've basically gotta be rude about it sometimes. So if that's what it takes, then go for it. Anything to make her get it. [Basically, you're not failing at making her get it, you're just learning ways that didn't work for you. There is no such thing as failure, unless it's at school] And once you know she gets it, find yourself some new friends [if you haven't already]. Girls who will be there for you & always have your back. Girls who won't backstab you or steal your boyfriend. Girls who give best friend a meaning, basically.
As for friend two, screw her. Don't say sorry to her at all. She started the fight, correct? If so, then you've got no reason to say sorry. Although you'd be the bigger woman, she doesn't deserve a sorry from you. She should be the one to apologize simply because she started it, and ended the friendship based on choice. The friendship ending was HER LOSS not yours. So don't feel inclined to say sorry, okay?
Just find yourself new friends, and ignore those two for good. I'm not telling you to just ignore an apology from them, you must definitely take it into consideration if you hear it, but until then, show no mercy, and don't back down. Stand up for yourself, and what you believe in. You don't always have to wait for someone else to apologize though. There are certain times to be the better/bigger person, and certain times not to. You should probably learn when those times are.
Good luck!
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