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Friends with Benefits
I've always had bad luck with guys, but somehow I have a "guy friend" that I've known for almost 5 years now. We used to have a thing but he's made it clear that he's not interested in me. I've always had feeling for him and that's never going to change. Lately we've been flirting and bordering on friends with benefits. Part of me thinks it's a good idea and another thinks I might get hurt. I'm realistic with myself and our lack of a future, but should I even risk getting hurt? Any opinions from someone that has been in this situation would help.
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Hey, well if there's anything I can tell you about this, DON'T CONTINUE BEING FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS, YOU WILL GET HURT and it won't be pretty, you'll be upset for a loong time... just, no. Lol. Well, if you have feelings for him, and he made it clear he does not feel the same way, you want to stop, like now, before you get more attached. The absolute best thing you can do is not be close with him until you're over him, but I know that's really really hard. Try to get over him and get less... flirty with him. Hope I helped ♥ Kathleen.
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i;ve done the same thing you are about to do.
more than once.
trust me. i made a mistake.
you WILL get hurt.
friends with benefits usually (almost always) ends with SOMEONE getting hurt.
someone ends up likeing someone else; and getting a girlfriend/boyfriend
or the one that that person likes hates that they would do the FWB thing...
or person A starts to like person B
and the fact you have a history with him; and still have feelings for him; is 100% PROMISE you WILL get hurt.
It may seem like a good idea; because you still get to be physically 'with' him; but it still is gonna hurt like hell
my advice would be dont do it.
you will get hurt.
you might think now you wont; you that you wont get hurt; but it's going to happen.
I know it's hard to resist; but TRUST me.
it's for the best.
let me know if you need ANYTHING else
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Might get hurt is an understatement. You WILL get hurt. Please, don't even think abut doing this. I've not been in this situation, but I've been around long enough to know those who have.
This might get harsh and I'm sorry for that but I do want you to understand this.
If you become friends with benefits, he has a good time but you will not. He will laugh & brag to his friends about how he is getting some from you while you convince yourself he is falling for you.
He dates another girl if he wants to. You don't date because you have it in your head he will someday see you are worth having as a girlfriend.
His girlfriend doesn't put out. She stays pure as the snow. Don't have to bother her for sex, you'll take all the risks. You don't tell her about you and him, if you do he walks. So you put up with it.
In the meantime, all these other guys know what your up to. If you do ever wise up they won't want you, you're used goods. If they do you'll wonder if they just want one thing.
No matter how you look at it, you are the one who gets hurt in this deal. Even the nicest guy in the world can hurt you. Actually, girls kind of set themselves up to be hurt. Quite innocently.
So wait for someone who cares. Maybe its this guy, maybe its someone else. but don't put benefits out on the table hoping it will make him see what a great girl you are and how perfect together you would be. It usually has just the opposite effect.
Make sure a guy respects you and loves you. If he doesn't then respect yourself and don't do it. :)
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hey, continuesly hooking up with someone that you have feelings for is never a good idea. to guys that dont have feelings for you back: a hookup is a hookup and means absolutely nothing. hooking up with him IS NOT going to change how he feels about you at all. your just going to wound up hurt. i would just either a) stay strictly friends with him or b) just stop talking to him all together to avoid the pain of knowing that he isnt interested.
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