it's been about three months & i'm still not over them
Question Posted Thursday March 22 2007, 8:18 am
13/f
a few months ago i lost my viginity to this guy who i met from a friends friends' brother. A lot of things happened and we all just stopped talking to eachother but i'm still not over them. yea i was kinda passed around but i still have feelongs for them and the other day i saw them again and i couldn't take it so i looked away but it killed me inside that we didn't say one word to eachother.
i know i still care for them and i know i need to get over them but i don't know how. i mean i don't under stand it. they hurt me so much, they lied, cheated and just let me fall to save them selves, but they have some kind of hold on me and i don't know what to do i mean what can i do.
after me and him were over i was asked out a lot but i couldn't say yes to any of them because they got in the way and made me rethink you know?
what do i do and how?
thanks a million!!
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life? angie91 answered Thursday March 22 2007, 8:06 pm: Hey!
Thats totally natural, don't feel bad about it because thats how you're supposed to feel. Yeah break ups are portrayed as something that people get over in a week or twoo, maybe three episodes of a show, and they're onto the next guy, but in life thats not how it is. And this was particularly different because this was a special guy, you did something with him, you havent done before, and thats what makes it different.
SO how do you get over him? Well there are lots of different ways to do this, and btw I wouldnt date for a while anyway, so dont worry about it.
K well there are the obvious things to do to get them off your mind like joining a club or a team, but what it seems to me is that there is something deeper there. Something that is scaring you away from moving on. It doesnt seem like you feel like its a mistake that you had sex for the first time, at a young age, but if it is, I have an answer, you can go to a church and get a purity ring, and they basically can do a ceremony to make you a virgin again in the eyes of god anyway. That might help, but if you just plan on doing it with the next guy, then its a waste of time.
But you seem to have anxieties when it comes to new guys, so we have to get over that. You need to build up trust with men again, because not all men will do that, so build up friendships rather than relationships with guys and once you learn to trust guys again, then try and date again. Sometimes getting over a guy takes a long time, so if in a couple of months you still arent over them, thats okay, but if you want some more tips let me know. I am the queen of moving on tips, so I'm sur eI have something that will help you out!
Hope I helped some, Lots of love,
Angie91 [ angie91's advice column | Ask angie91 A Question ]
christina answered Thursday March 22 2007, 10:46 am: When someone else asks you out, just go out with them. But don't do it just to be nice, do it because you like them.
Don't make some other group of people change your mind about your decisions. Make them on your own. If it's a mistake, you'll learn from it.
And try to occupy your time w. new friends, and new people. That way when they come around; they won't seem so important. Because they're not. [ christina's advice column | Ask christina A Question ]
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