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ugh... this is so stupid and confusing. Boys. >_<
Okay. So there's this guy(he's 15) and I like him(14). We're at this spot where I feel like we're more than friends, but he doesn't see it. He is very... blind? He asked me out two halloweens ago at a dance, and then 9 months later told me he didn't know we were going out. >_< Anyway, I love this guy, a lot(no its not dumb high school stuff. I want him. For life. I would MARRY him if he asked me. srsly.)
Last night we went to see a play(slasreveR neveS[he's so backwards... he loved it]) and the whole time we were messing around, playing with each other; poking, teasing. Afterward, I called for our ride, and we were hanging out in the lobby with this girl, and it was fine, totally natural, no jealousy, no flirting with her. Well, so we got in the car, and the next thing I knew, his hand was with mine. I'm like WHAT? he didn't hold it all through the show, but the minute people couldn't see us...? He also brought me a present... Earrings. GORGEOUS earrings. darkish silver, circular with red beads. perfect for me.
the only thing is, he doesn't like me. I asked him to the Sweethearts Dance at V-day, and he said IMMEDIATELY; "Just as friends right?"(he went, we danced the one slow dance)
Anyone want to clue me in?
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He likes you but is scared of liking you, and therefore he is trying to deny it by not holding your hand in public, by saying he is not going out with you, by adding "just as friends right?" after you asked him out to the sweethearts dance. Most probably he isn't blind, but just freaked out by how he feels about you... I don't know much about him but I'm guessing he is still wary about relationships.
If you love this guy like you say you do, I suggest you give him more time to adjust to the "more than friends" thing. I suggest you don't go up to him directly demanding a confession as to whether he likes you or not because 1. it'll put him on the spot, make him more awkward, and he may not even mean what he says since he seems to be confused/freaked out by the whole thing 2. Hello? he held you hand. Why would he do that if he didn't feel something for you in that way? Body language does count as a language, you know.
Another thing: since he doesn't know how you feel, he may be pushing the friends thing so as not to push YOU into anything.
But like I said, give it time. You two are still young and have lots of it to figure out how you feel about each other. It must be hard for him being a confused commitmentophobe, but don't worry, they usually do get their act together when they are ready and when they realize they want something enough =] besides, holding hands, even in secret, is quite an accomplishment.
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Here is a simple explanation to your confusing friendly flirty boy:: *Guys were simply put on this Earth to confuse us girls!* Can I get an Amen to that??? Lol ok it sounds like he's playing mind tricks with you...like he likes you but doesn't want to admit, or he just gets into the moment at times...he sounds like a typical confusing male! lol just let him play it out for like a month or so, then see what happens.
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His problem is probably commitment. It sounds like he likes you, but he just doesn't want to be ur bf because maybe he has had gf trouble before and doesn't want to get hurt again. Maybe you should ask him why he doesn't want to be anything, but friends. If he is really your friend than he will give you an honest answer and you might end up going out with him or just friends. But nothing can be worse then wondering. Trust me talk to him :)
Hope I helped. If you have more questions go ahead and ask me.
Love,
Nicole x0x0x0
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Ok im 14/f and i know exactly what you are talking about. the same thing happened to me. my best guy friend made it seem like he liked me by doing things that you described, the hugs, holding hands. and he would always wanna sit next to me or be with me. and then he found out that i told my friend that i thought he liked me. and so he came up to me and told me that he only wanted to be friends. it really sucked because even after he said it he still acted like he liked me. some guys are afraid of commitment, as in they dont want a girlfriend rite now. i know you love him and want him and feel like this is the only guy for you. but my advise is to just give it time. just be friends for now and if he keeps flirting and stuff well you cant really control that. what i did was get over him, it was the hardest thing ever to get over a guy you wish you had soooo bad. now whenever i see him i dont feel awkward or anything. i know i can just go up to him and play around like friends. maybe in the future this guy will actually like you but i wouldnt count on it. if hes anything like my friend then he is really flirtatious but doesnt want to commit. i would ask him directly if he likes you. if he says no then move on. if he says yes then you know hes just afraid to commit. message me back if you have more to the story. i would relly like to be able to help you. and yes guys are soooo confusing!!! haha yea they are well hope we can tallk more later.
love,
SAM~ =]
ok im responding to your feedback. the same thing happened with me he never actually told me no i dont like you until i said that i needed to know the truth and asked "Do you like me or not?" and then he said no, which was a real shock! but maybe this guy likes you and just doesnt want to commit. my friend had a bad experiance with his last gf and doesnt want the same to happen again so he just wants "friends" rite now. Ask him strait out and if he starts talking about something else or tries to avoid the question then ask him again,tell him you NEED to know because you are very confused. sorry this guy is causing you so much confusion. hope he gives you the answer you want! if not then you will need to move on, trust me some guys are not worth the hastle.
SAM~
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