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why am i jelous of 13 year olds I started going out with my current boyfriend at the beginning of freshman year in high school. Since then he's gotten to know alot of new people. When he first asked me out he was shy, cute, and sensitive. A total opposite of me. (which i loved!) I just don't understand why he chose me! There are tons of girls who would love to have him glance their way. I'm weird, nerdy, and lets just say that I'm not hott or sexy. But he puts up with me and is very loyal and sweet. ( which amazes me.) But i still can't help feeling jealous when someone starts flirting with him right in front of me! what are they, stupid??? I mean, I get so mad when little 8th graders start yelling,"hey hottie! why don't you leave that over there ("that" meaning me) and come sit with me!" Why should I get jealous!?!? I know everyone gets jealous, but when I'm with him i get mad at the littlest thing. I get so worked up that I don't want to get 'intimate '(nonsexual) . And when we're not together, like after a date, I feel really bad. I would love it if you could give me some type of strategy to help clam down. Thanks Amanda
-Someone you know
[ ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Your jealousy is justified, in a way. I mean, this guy means a lot to you, and you don't want to lose him (especially to another girl).
But this jealousy can also be tied to your insecurity. You think that because you say that you're "weird, nerdy, and not hot or sexy," that he'll dump you when he sees a girl he thinks is "hot" or when another girl gives him attention. That's not true, and I'll prove it to you.
Let's say you're out with friends. You see a random guy that you know from school who just happens to be really, really hot. He comes over and talks to you and your friends, and gives you a lot of attention. While this may make you feel good, does it make you like your boyfriend any less? Probably not, and the same goes for him: Just because other girls pay attention to him, doesn't mean he'll leave or be unfaithful to you.
Remember that he's known a ton of girls for a LONG time. Even when he asked you out, and before that, he knew a lot of girls, and has had a lot of girls like him. But, he chose you. If he really likes you (and believe me, he does), no amount of flirting from any girl can change that.
There isn't really a strategy to make you stop feeling this way. You just have to have confidence (and faith!) in him, you, and the relationship. If he hasn't done anything to betray your trust, you don't have anything to worry about. Don't let your jealousy get to you, because you're so much more amazing than you'll ever know.
I hope I helped, and if you have any more questions, feel free to leave one in my inbox!
-Manders ]
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