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humorist-workshop
my friend is doing bad stuff
ok well i dont know if this is the rite topic..but..my friend*Whitney* has been going out with this guy*kevin*. She is in 8th grade and he is in 9th. well wen he first asked her out about a month ago she asked me what i thought..i told her that it wasnt a good idea because all he wants to do it "get down her pants". i know that from other people going out with him. She told me in the begnining of there relationship that she promised she wouldnt do anything. well they were at a football game (high school) and he tried to finger her. she told him not rite now. and i respect that brcause she didnt do it. well a couple days ago she was at his house and he figered her..she said it hurt really bad and she was scared to tell me because she knew i would get really mad. well of course i was and i tried to let it go but this guy is knows for doing really bad stuff. im really worried about her. she has it in her mind that she loves him but i know she doesnt and im scared he going to pressure her into doing something she doesnt want to do. i dont know how to come about this..or how i can look out for her because i kno anything i say wont matter..shes moving way to quickly with this relationship. i need help..thanks in advance
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Hunni, if talking to your friend doesne't work (and I would prolly try again and be really serious with her and tell her EXACTLY how you feel), then I would go to an adult. Someone who you can trust and who can help you. Parents, perhaps? However, untimately, she is the only person who can fix her situation. Noone else. Worrying about her isnt going to do any good until she WANTS help, herself. I wish there was more you could really do, but there isnt. In the meantime, just be there for you friend but focus on youself for a while. I am sure this will all settle itself when the time comes. Best of Luck! Your a great friend for being so concerned! <3
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Tell someone. If you can't convince her yourself, tell her or your parents. She'll hate you for a while but she'll understand why later. Why have her hate you forever because you didn't do anything to stop her and let her do something she will regret later.
It will hurt to do it, but it will hurt more if she gets presured. If she has sex because she wants to please him, the pressure and hate for sex will follow her through life.
Do something to save her.
-Zeph
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Whoa, first off you don't know if she loves this boy or not. She may love him very much. You're her bestfriend, and she shouldn't be scared to tell you anything. And you shouldn't have gotten mad. She wasn't forced into it, so he did nothing wrong. You guys are growing up and she has a boyfriend now that she is going to eventually do stuff with whether you like it or not.
The best thing to do is let her make her own 'mistakes' if that truely what you think this is, and then be there for her when it all blows up in her face (if it does.)
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Well, sorry to say but seriously, the only thing you can do in this kind of situation is sit back and watch, if nothing you say will help her. Everyone has to learn lessons in life, if he ends up getting in her pants and getting her to go in his and then just dumps her, she will have learned her lesson. The most you can do is pretty much just be there for her when she really needs you, a.k.a. when she does learn her lesson. If she asks your opinion in the meantime though, tell her the whole truth and what you think about him and don't hold back.
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We are all blind when it comes to crushes and boyfriends especially because of our hormones.
Warn her that he's already gotten in her pants and he'll try to advance more. Tell her that there is always a risk of pregnancy and STDs even with a condom and she shouldn't lose her virginity to some guy that's known to be a player?
Tell her that you're not jealous or anything but more worried that she'll do something she'll regret later on. She may say that she won't let him take her virginity and whatever and so then you will remind her that she broke her frst promise by engaging in a sexual activity and she'll be pressured by him to have full sex with him.
You're not pressuring her in a bad way. You're steering her in a good way and if talking fails, you did all you can for her. She'll regret later on if she does something stupid with this guy and instead of turning your back on her, just be her friend throughout this whole thing and try to steer her in the right way.
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Let her know what you think. She deserves to know the truth, and if she's a true friend, she'll understand and try to take your advice. Stand by her no matter what she does. Everyone makes mistakes, and if she doesn't take your advice, she'll regret it later, and you'll be there to comfort her.
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