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She's heartbroken :'[
one of my very good friends has had this MAJOIR OBSESIVE CRUSH on this guy in our grade. shes liked him for 5 years now & has hardly said 2 words to him. i've become very good friends with him & gotten to know him very well. he asked me if she liked him [because it was totally obvious] and i said yes. she is really worried now that he likes me not her & is starting to get frustrated. i'm sick of hearing all of her drama about this boy & i really think she just needs to move on with her life, but how am i supposed to tell this to the most shy girl in our grade. she has cried on the phone to me for 5 hours before, when he didn't ask her to dance at our 8th grade graduation party. i'm just stuck we're sophmores in highschool & shes still obsessed with him. how do i tell her to move on without breaking her heart even more?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
You don't deserve to be their go-between. It's not fair to you. This is their problem, not yours.
"Shy Girl" needs to buck up and either get over her crush or do something about it, and soon. You might tell her that the next time she starts going off on you about this guy, you're going to call him and put her on the phone so she can tell him all about it instead. Being a friend and a confidante is fine and good, but there are limits.
As for the guy, I really don't blame him for not wanting to approach a girl with a MAJOR OBSESSIVE CRUSH on him. Contrary to popular belief, this is not an attractive quality; it's scary! Who wants to be the target of an obsession?
However, he does have the power to break the tension, and you might consider asking him, as a favor, to do so. He knows how you friend feels about him; it would be the gentlemanly thing to do for him to let her know how he feels about her. Just make sure that YOU aren't there for that conversation; this is between the two of them.
Finally, there is indeed the possibility that he DOES like you instead of her. Be aware that if this is the case and you take him up on it, you will lose your friend, simple as that.
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I know a lot of girls who have been totally obsessed with a guy and once they started going out things started falling into place. Actually, a lot of them dumped the guy because they saw his real self instead of the idealistic version they saw him to be.
Chances are, you telling her to move on is just going to make her think you're clearing the way for you and him so why don't you help her out a bit? Set them up on a date and coach her so she doesn't fall to pieces on it and before the month's end she'll either be over him, or going out with him but at least she won't be as crazy-obsessed.
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