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why are guys so difficult?
Hi! I'm seventeen and I'm a girl. I'm in a little bit of a pickle. I was with this guy who I've known for about two years now nd I'm soo in love with him. We have everything in common and we are so alike. The thing is that we've never met. We met through a website and just started talking from there. I would talk to him everyday nd about everything. I feel in love with his personality. Some people don't understand how I can love someone I've never met but its possible. We live in the same state but about 40 minutes away from each other. Which is not too bad. Why haven't we met yet? Good question. Everytime we tried to meet up, something would come up or happen that he couldn't make it. Now two weeks ago we planned to meet at a mall. I went nd he called nd told me that he didn't have a ride. I was devistated. What do u think this means? I have put a lot of effort in trying to see him but it seems like he hasn't put enough. I can't take the heartaches anymore so I told him we should see other people. He hung up on me. I cryed for hours. But now I've found a better guy who I can see nd spend time with. Someone who actually appriciates me nd doesn't take me for granted. Do u think I made the right choice?
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Nobody here can tell you whether or not you made the right choice, and I'm telling you that right now. I'm going to leave that one up to you.
Despite what you may think, I do understand your situation. In some ways I can relate. It is truly great and long lasting to love somebody for who they are and not what they look like or what you physically do with them.
Yes it is difficult. So your relationship was built on trust, on commitment, honesty, responsibility, sincerity...aren't those things supposed to be what relationships are built on? As for him not putting in the effort, maybe you can cut him some slack. While you do live only 40 minutes away, it's not as bad as a two hour state-boundry-crossing distance, and I can vouch for that one.
Go back and talk to him, like really talk to him. Tell him how you feel and ask him how he feels. You should not break things off just because you havn't met yet or you don't feel that he's putting in the effort. Ultimately, most of those things are not in your control or his control, meeting up I mean. Good things come to those who wait. I would ask you to reconsider things with him. I'm not saying it was a bad choice, but if you really connected so well with each other and got to know each other and love each other for it, then doesn't that say more than just meeting up at a party and going inbetween the sheets? So I say think things through and talk it out.
Just because you can spend time with the other guy doesn't make him a better guy. Not saying he isn't better, but I've seen cases where a lot of people would rather have a good strong long distance relationship instead of a crummy lousy "see each other all the time" relationship. Think things through and sort out your feelings, and definately talk to him. Hope that helped and good luck.
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I think the reason he wasn't put such for an effort is because he could've been majorly nervous. I know I was when I was in a similiar situation like this. If me and him were ever going to meet I was sitting there thinking,"Oh my god, what if he thinks I'm ugly in person? What if he hates me? What if it's awkward? What are we going to talk about, what am I going to do? Hug him? Is that too weird?" And I was FREAKING OUT. So he could've just been extremely nervous to meet you and was afraid something might go wrong, or something might be said and you'd never want to see him again or talk to him. Meeting someone you really like that you've never even met for 2 years CAN be extremely nerve wracking.
If you really love him and still want to meet him, I suggest calling him up though and asking if he wants to give it one more try and meet up one final time and see what happens. I mean if you two are meant to be together, then this is the perfect opportunity to prove it and see where it takes you. If you really love him, you can't just give up like that. But if it falls through once again and he doesn't make effort, I suggest sticking with the guy you got.
But to answer the final quesiton, I do think you made a somewhat right choice. Like I said I don't think it's the right choice to give up so easily ( hence the suggestion I made of giving it another shot ) but I do think it was the right choice to sort of stop yourself from getting hurt anymore and going through more heartbreak and finding someone who'll be there for you and make an effort and everything.
So, think about if you really still want to meet this guy or not, and just see where everything takes you. If you and this guy are meant to be together again, you will be. But if nothing happens, it wasn't meant to be with him, and maybe you're supposed to be with your current guy.
( Sorry if I sound confusing, lol. Sometimes when I answer with long advice, I tend to ramble after awhile, haha. )
I hope I helped.
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Well, do whatever it takes to meet him. If you love him, you wont stop at anything to meet him face to face. Keep trying. Im sure one day you guys will meet face to face... But... Since he NEVER shows up to any of the places you want to meet, he's not worth your time.....
Yes you have made the right choice. Dont worry about it. Everythings going to be allright. You have met a new guy, and thats good! That means you have moved on to better things. This is VERY good! You guys spend lots of time with eachother, and thats one of the keys to a good relationship. :)
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