|
Ex boyfriend might have cheated on me and i'm completely hea
17/f - My boyfriend (15 yrs old.) broke up with me a few days ago because he said he didn't want to be in a relationship right now because a few months ago he got out of a 2 yr relationship with a girl he loved that cheated on him with his cousin and bestfriend. We didn't go out that long but I ended having strong feelings for him. He wanted to be friends but it bothered me too much. I think he only wanted sex and I'm still a virgin and I don't want to have sex yet. Anyways, I was on the phone with him yesterday and he was kidding around alot about having sex with me and being friends with benefits (which I seriously DON'T want). I got really pissed off and hung up. So he called back and told me he wouldn't kid around with me anymore and then he told me he wanted to be honest with me and tell me something and said he had sex with this girl on my bus twice! Once, the week before me and him started to go out and wednesday (2 days after he broke up with me)! I was crying and my friend that was over asked if she could talk to him and she did. When she got off the phone we talked about him and everything. She went through almost the same stuff I had to go through and told me I should stop talking to him and maybe be friends with him later when I was ready. I know it's a good choice and I called him and told him I didn't want to be friends right now and he said ok and we hung up. I'm just so heartbroken and a part of me wants him and a part wants me to forget him and move on. I'm also thinking he might have cheated on me while we were going out but I don't want to find out even he did. My questions are: Do you think it's a good thing I stopped talking to him for now? Should I move on? Or be friends with him? How can I make things easier for me not to get jealous seeing him with other girls and help me move on? Also, the girl he had sex with has A BOYFRIEND!! Don't you think it's wrong since he had to deal with his exgirlfriend cheating on him so why would he let that happen to another guy?! Ughh seriously I just need some advice and opinions on what to do. Thanks and sorry it's so long.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Miscellaneous category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Random Weirdos?
First of all, I think it was really smart of you to cut him off for now and not even talk to him or be friends with him for the moment. Yes, I think you should move on and by having him hanging around and everything would only remind you of things and it'd be it 39430493 times harder for you to get over him and move on. But definnnneteeelllyyy move on! This guy is a complete jerk and doesn't deserve you one bit.
Like your friend said, once you're fully over him and feel you can handle being friends with him without feelings returning ; then why not? I seriously wouldn't want anything to do with him at all, but it's your choice if you want to continue a friendship.
To help yourself not get jealous when he's with other girls, like I said, don't look at him, talk to him, just ignore him and especially whenever you see him with other girls, just turn the other direction and walk away or walk on by him like he's nothing. And everytime you feel you can never get over him, or think of all the good times, then think of the bad even more. Think of how much of a jerk he is and what he did to you.
I do agree ; I think it's really wrong of him AND her to both get together when for one the girl's already with someone and he himself experienced getting cheated on. He probably just let that happen cause he didn't care about the other guy ; he only cares for himself and what he wants, and what he wants is some two-timing rebound girl.
Like I said, just back away from this guy completley, he doesn't deserve you or any other girl, for that matter. But if over time you feel you can at least talk to him sometimes and have a casual friendship, then I don't see what's the harm.
I hope I helped.
]
Darling, gosh I fel so sorry for you, he is a real jerk. I know you miss him, but don't let yourself, you seem like a wonderful person for having such strong morals. I say don't be friends with him untill you are okay, and you realize that you are too good of a person to swoon over him. It will be hard, but lean on your friend for support, you will get through this. Hope for the best!
~*Brianna*~
]
I do think that it is a good thing that you stopped talking to him. He needs to learn that he cant control you, and you need a few days(or weeks or months or however long) to calm down and get back into a good state of mind. You should move on, it sortof sounds like you were the rebound girl, and that all he wants is sex, adn if he's getting it from someone else... then he doesnt need you, which is wrong. you deserve better. he acted very immaturely, and I think that you dont need him as a friend right now, friends dont act that way, maybe in a few months he will smarten up and you too can be friends again, but I doubt that actually dating him again would be a very good idea. I think that you need to look for another boyfriend, or atleast spend time with other male friends, because if you dont, girls tend to believe that men are all alike, and you shouldnt believe that all men are like that, because I'm pretty sure that there are alot of better guys out there who would love to be your friend or boyfriend. and as far as the last part, I think that is the reason that he slept with that other girl, he was angry with the girl that cheated on him, and was trying to get back at her through you (I know that makes no sense, but guys are very complex... and they are also not complex at all. which is probably even more confusing, but thats okay, all girls get confused by them sometimes). I think that you sound like a great person, and that you should go out and have fun with your friends. try your hardest to get your mind off of your ex, and also congratulations on standing up for what you believe in, friends with benifits is a tupid idea if you ask me. I hope I helped, and good luck moving on.
]
It may seem like part of you wants him, but im sure part of you just wants what you THOUGHT he was. it does sound like he WAS only after sex, so, yes its good you stopped talkin to him for now. thats the only way to really help yourself get over him. if you get used to life without him by not being friends with him, itll be so much easier on you, even if it seems hard now; but if you still try to be friends with him, those feelings will stay with you and youll only be hurting yourself more. later on, maybe if one day yall strike up a random conversation after things have died down and youre ok without him, and things are cool between yall, then im sure yall will be able to be friends, but just dont push it. as far as bein jealous when you see him with other girls, just realize that now he's THEIR problem and you can find someone so much better. if he had sex with that girl that soon before & after yalls relationship, chances are, he WAS cheating on you. but obviously i cant be sure. and if he did that to her when she says a bf, then he probably used that as a way to try to get over his last girlfriend, or hes just really inconsiderate, although he shouldnt be since hes been in that situation. but if he didnt care that her bf could find out and be hurt, then he probably didnt really care if he hurt you either. hes a guy, you kno we'll never really understand them, lol. all you can do is AVOID him for now, and go out with friends and just try to have a good time, and try meeting some new guys too! yeah you probably arent ready to right now, but the sooner you get talkin to some guys, the sooner youll be over him, and even if you dont end up with a new bf soon, talkin to more guys will at least get you some more friends to help in this situation [ and get revenge on guys like your ex for you! ;) ] haha. good luck girl!
]
its ok its so long i read it all :0). ok what i think is that you not talking to him was the best thing. i think he just used you like you wrote just to have sex. next time u see him with a girl think that hes a looser and that shes the one that has to put up with him now. your very lucky that you choose the right thing to do. many girls might have done sex with him like the girl on the bus did. also r u possitive that he had sex with that girl on the bus? maybe he just wants you to get jelous?. hes defentely (spelling?) not the right guy for you. you deserve someone better.someone who isnt only with you just for sex. he left you just because you wouldnt do "it" with him. thats not right you should be with someone that loves you and just wants to be with you. you are a person thats worth alot dont be waisting your time with someone that doesnt worth crap.you will eventually find a great guy that loves you and then youll be happy that you left that jerk and that your still a vergin. remember you can only be a virgin once! goodluck and i hope i helped and sorry its so long. :o)
]
More Questions: |