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work
Hi I am 17 years old and I work in a store. Another girl I work with asked me if I can work on columbus day, when she wa supposed to work. I accepted, since I didn't think I was doing anything. Then my parents blew up at me because my dad took the day off & they want to do something as a family. They told me it's allmy fault that I didn't ask if he was taking the day off. I told them he should have told me he was taking the day off, but they said NO I should ask (which they have NEVER told me to do before). But they do not see my side of it, that I accepted to work so I can't change my mind now & that they should have told me he was taking the day off (am i supposed to guess that out of thin air?) Who is right here, & what can I do about this, they are so mad at me.??
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You are in the right here.
Explain that you now have your own schedule, and that while you are sorry the plans may be interrupted, but if your dad decided to take a day off and make plans, then he should have told you when on the day he requested columbus day off, or discussed it with you before hand.
You are more than old enough that they cant make plans for you without consulting you. Family plans are important to you, but so are obligations to others, when you say you will do something for someone you keep that word. Just tell them that you would like them to tell you when they make plans involving you, so that you can know not to make commitments. Explain to them that the person making the plans involving others has the responsiblity to let those others know. Normally, yes you ask them for permission to do things. These things you would ask permission for are things that you want to make sure they are ok with you doing at all, like going to a party or staying out late, etc. Things that are perfectly within the rules are things you shouldnt have to ask permission for.
Offer a compromise. Tell them that if you alter your work schedule in the future that you will do your best to keep them appraised, and at the same time tell them that you would like to be notified of any plans they make that they intend to involve you in. As a courtesy, it would be something you would appreciate if you could know about your commitments when they are made rather than when you make plans because you didnt know they made a commitment for you.
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No one's really right here. It would certainly have been nice, and easier on everyone, if your parents had had the sense to tell you they wanted a family day, and at the same time it would have been nice and easier on everyone if you had the presence of mind to call and check with them that it was okay to take that shift.
In the end though, it's no one fault, it's just a miscommunication. Apologize (just one time) for the confusion and don't try to get rid of the shift if you don't feel right about that. Let your parents deal with their anger on their own. Don’t feel guilty about that, miscommunications happen. Don’t let them abuse you over it.
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