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Hey..sorry its soo long i hope you can help im the one usually giving advice if you ever need some ask me!
I hav been going out for this guy let's call him Josh for almost 10 months. We hav an amazing relationship and he really is my best friend. We have one problem his ex girlfriend is insane. She is obssesed with him and there is a long story behind that but just to make it short she is jealous and she wants him and her and I got into a big thing. I don't liek to start things and i do stand up for myself but i don't liek having enemies. About 2 weeks ago. My boyfriend started treating me like crap. This is 2 weeks ago: Saturday night we got into a fight because his ex's friends were starting stuff with my friends. I told him that i didn't know if i cood take i anymore. We weren't on the best page. Since it is summer we don't see eachother that much he went to camp before these 2 weeks and now he's on vacation. SO back to Saturday so that happened then on Sunday we talked and he was mad and upset. On monday we were planning to see eachother on tuesday but my friends messed it up. Also on monday we had a long talk about his ex and hwo i feel like he doesn't stand up for me like he should. When our plans got ruined for tuesday i was upset but it seemed like he didn't even care. On tuesday he called me at night and we didn't talk much but i asked him what he did today and he said nothing and that he's been thinkin about alot. I got a little worried. Well anyways Wedneday came n i went to my friends house with him and all my friends.I decided to just forget about everything because he was leaving that friday and i thought it would be the last time i would see him so i wanted it to be good. It somehow came up and he wanted to talk and said that i don't feel like he is really intersting and all that and he simply told me that he was just thinking that the relationship is getting too serious as in commitment wise. I understood because we are still young but how could he tell me he loves me if he doesn't wanna be with me. Well anyways on thursday i found out that on wednesday night he slept at his friends house and he did a camera thing with one ofmy friends theyw ere all joking but he told her to pull her shirt down more so her boobs would show. It's so hard to even write this because he's so not like this. On thursday night i found out earlier that day his ex adn her friends came over to swim with his friends. Just to amek it short on friday i saw him for 2 minutes and i was planning on talking to him about it but he could only stay for like 5 minutes. He was being an ass and he just left and said i love you bye. He's on vacation right now and i don't know what to do when he comes back. Thanx for reading this .What should i do?HE was never liek this before and all of a sudden he was acting liek an ass. I'm confused and i think i will regret iof i break up with him but at the same time i want him to go out with his exand see how diffent it is and realize he needs me but then i feel like i'd look like an idiot if i go back with him if he comes back to me later
please hlp thanx soo much for reading this. I'm 14 and a girl.lol
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Hey. First off, I'm really sorry for what has happened to you, and I am always here.
You are three options in a situtaion like this. Here they are:
1- You could break up with him. Every girl should be treated like a princess, and in this case you aren't. He is treating you like crap and no girl deserves that. Then he goes and tells that girl to show off her boobs?? A def. NO. He isn't standing up for you at all and he doesn't want a committment. If you guys are really in love and you love eachother, committment shouldn't even be a problem, it should be as natural as breathing. I can tell that you love him, but think to yourself, does he love you back? Does he show it? You can't just TELL someone you love them, you have to SHOW it. To me, it doesn't seem like he is. You should be treated the right way, no matter what. But also, did you do anything to him that may make him be such an ass? You need to think of that too. If you do end up breaking up, it will be hard, of course it will be for like a few weeks. But you will get over it, I promise.
2- Sit down with him and talk to him. Both of you could sit down and talk to him. Tell him how you are feeling about his ex and really say it. Tell him that you told him once, and you shouldn't have to say it again, you shouldn't have to say it at all, but you want this to work. Next, tell him about the all boob thing and that you really really didn't like that and that could def. change how you feel about him. (also, do you trust him? if you don't mention that too) Next, talk to him about commitment and if he doesn't want to committ to you and doesn't want to be with you, why did he telll you he loves you? Put him on the spot for once. Ask him if you did something wrong that is making him treat you like crap.
3- Take a break from eachother. Tell him that you guys need a break and in like two weeks or whatever you think is good, then get back together and see how things go then. Remember that summer can bring out the worst in people cause guys and girls liek to be whores over the summer.
Whatever option you pick will be right cause you know more about your relationship then I do. I am always here and please feel free to ask me any other questions. My IM is xomtin33. I am online a lot so you can catch me there too. Good luck with everything and I really hope it works out. You sound like a great girl and any guy would be lucky to have you. Everyone has relationship problems, and it's good that you actually want to do something about it.
-Marissa
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Wow.
That was a very hard question.
I know exactly where you're coming from though.
And thank you for coming to me.
Actually-the best thing you can do is give it time and see where it takes you. If he comes back from Vacation and is still acting like that, then you need to sit him down and talk to him. It could be that he still likes his ex, or he could be afraid of actually falling in love with you. Guys sometimes have problems like that and it causes them to act differently. You guys seem like a good couple, but like I said, if he still treats you badly once he comes back and if he does it after you talk to him, then maybe its time you let him go. If he does go back with his ex and he finds out that its not what he expected, then he'll come back to you. Dont do it. Let him figure out what he did wrong and why he lost you. There are better guys out there. Good Luck hun.
-Wicked.
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It sounds like you guys really need to talk..
"Communication is the glue that hold Relationships together." When he gets back, just be serious and talk to him about whats going on. If you cant express whats going on to him, then you might have some insecurity. But thats how I am too.
Tell him that you are having mixed signals from him, tell him that you love him and you need to talk to him about things. Just be calm though, because a fight is the worst thing that could happen.
If you just let things go, you will never feel the "right" way. So the best advice I ahve is to talk to him.
If you want, IM me @: Alexis72605
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Sounds like you are in a bit of a pickle.
Boys are so difficult to decipher and we always want to show them that we are great for them, better than any other girl has treated him. When boys are under the influence of their male friends, they don't necessarily think, which explains his uncommon behavior asking the girl to pull down her shirt further.
You must really like him for all the internal problems putting yourself through. When he comes back, ask him straight out what he wants from the relationship. Does he want to break up because it is too serious? Does he want to take things slower, and still be with you because he cares so much for you that he cannot not be with you? You may like him more than you can even explain, and that's why it makes things so hard.
Don't let him treat you badly, no one deserves that...especially since you have not done anything to merit that. If he keeps acting that way, you may stop liking him, and it's not guaranteed you'll be around forever and then he may lose the best thing in his life.
Let him know that you have always tried your best with your relationship, and that he should do it too...it's only fair.
Ultimately, you should let him decide what he wants. If it doesn't work out...it's his loss.
I hope it all works out girly.
-Teacup
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WOW lol. ok first things first. If you want to keep him you need to get everyone else in check before he gets back. Your friend that pulled her shirt down so her boobs would show...ummmm uh-uh.
Whatever way it was took- that was flirting. I'd tell her I didnt appreciate her showin her tits like that. Next thing...the ex-girlfriend. What's up with her? I'm assumin they broke up on bad terms for her to turn into a stalker/bitch. Let her know.... *IF* he wanted you so bad, he would be with you. Take a hint. Now..Moving on to the boyfriend... It's time for a serious talk with him. Let him know that regardless if he wants a SERIOUS relationship with you or not that you still demand respect. (Him telling that girl to pull her shirt down & dissin' you at places) Girl, if you put your foot down now..things will work out so much better for you in the end. Let him know you love him but you won't continue to be treated as 2nd best. When he get's back from vacation.. DONT CALL HIM. Let him come to you. You want you to be in his head not him all up in yours. Now, Let's say he wants to break up for whatever reason... Say ok if that's the way you want it...and leave it at that. Let him see you having fun, going out, doing your thing. Even if yall were at a party and he danced with another girl (he would only do that to piss you off) then you just keep lauging and hangin it with your friends like you couldn't give 2 shits if he was even there or not. This will make him come CRAWLING back to you. Humans always want what they think they can't have. ~*Always remember that*~
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