i am into a long distant relationship. my girl is in school (university). i dont see her often but i talk with her several times everyday. most times when i call at night she is usually with a guy she calls her casual friend, hanging outside her hostel with him till as late as midnight, almost every night. i asked if the guy doesnt have a gilrfriend to hang with and she says he doesnt. i have had haggles with her about 3 times asking if she is dating the guy but she insists that they are only friends and even says the guy is looking forward to meeting me and taking me out whenever i come to visit her. she even once asked if she should give the phone to the guy so that i talk to him but i was too angry to reply her at that time. i dont know if she is telling the truth. how can i find out if she is telling the truth? is it right for me to ask the guy outright (on the phone or in person) if he is dating her? i will be going to spend one or two nights in the town she is schooling from Monday.
karenR answered Friday August 4 2006, 10:49 am: If you think about it logically if she was having an affair with this guy why would she talk about him with you? Why would he be interested in meeting you?
You want to be careful that your being jealous doesnt drive her right into this other guys arms.
So painful as it may be to keep the jealousy to yourself, I think you need to try.
Go meet him. Its possible you could become friends. If you feel a real need to ask him how he feels about your girl then do it in person. Don't have an attitude about it when you ask...just tell him you are curious about it. Admit to being jealous if you want to. Don't ask while she is there either. You don't need an argument! Then later tell her you asked him about it so she doesn't here it from him later and get pissed.
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