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i can't deal with it anymore PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME
my mother has a big mouth and i can't deal with it anymore. she's always talking crazy. like, she says she is going to leave from this house and that nobody is ever going to see not even her hair anymore and she says that she's very sick and is going to end up in the hospital, when she knows she isn't and she should be cherishing her health. but, today she got out of control with her stupid big mouth! i was getting this little cheerleading outfit for a football game and she said that if i wore that i was nothing more than a retard and that all i look like is a self-concious monkey. other than that, she thinks she's a teenager and she truly and honestly tries to do everything in a teenager's perspective. well, today, when she told me that i was a retard, i started crying because i'm tired of her offending me. she's told me that 100 times. i told her i hated her and that she's changed, and i went away crying. when i was leaving the house to go to my aunt's house across the street, i apologized to her for having told her i hated her. i don't hate her, but i hate how she calls me names. as i was leaving my grandmother told me to apologize to her for having told her that SHE CHANGED! wow. so i told her but i told my grandmother that she should also be sorry for having called me names and my own grandmother said she shouldn't be sorry. she is always offending me with her big mouth, and right now when i told her she shouldn't have called me that she told me "do you want me to call you that again?" so that's it! i can't deal with her anymore. she's not the same sweet lady that use to take care of me and smile at me when i was a baby. that's when she was going through a divorce because my father left our family for an alchoholic stripper at a bar. so, then if anything was when she should have been hysterical. not now. and that has affected me too so i'm not being selfish. everyone acts like it didn't happen to me, but how do you think i feel? it hurts me too, you know. so, if my mom is constantly on myspace thinking she's a teenager, how does she expect me to respect her when all i see her as is a little sister because that's what she's acting like. why is everyone taking her side and saying that she has the right to call me names? it's not fair! no one cares about anything and the way that i feel! my heart is going super fast and i can't live like this anymore. i have to stop this fighting now. i was hoping that if any of you could, if you could tell me a way that i could apologize or make her stop. a way to make her stop calling me names and not caring. i want it to catch up to her. i want it to haunt her in her sleep fall the insults that she's said. how can i do this? and how can i still make her think i'm not a bad daughter, because of right now i don't think she every wants to speak with me again
15/f
signed,
anxiously waiting
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Oh my
Dear Anxiously Waiting,
I feel for you so bad, I'm seroius,
my heart goes out for you, because I've never been in a situation that complicated.
I mean it sounds like your mom wants to be young again? But your mom has NO right at all to call you names, let a lone retard, Thats a horrible name to call anyone, its mocking mentally ill people and I dont think its appropriate. Dont apologize to your mom, becuase you didnt do anything, its her who has the obvious issue. I mean and your grandma, I cannot beleive she said that either.
I highly HIGHLY suggest you go talk to a counsular about this, I mean you cant grow up like this. Think about your future :(
Dear, If you need anyont to talk to feel free for IMing me at any of my address on my advice column.
But you really need to get your mom some help, I mean shes not a teenager and she needs to take care of you, not be like you, I mean your fifteen, you need a mentor and an adult, but one whos being good, so you can look up to her.
I feel so bad, I hope things get better.
Let me know how things go. Your in my prayers.
<3
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A lot of people are in your same situation. Instead of parents being parents they run out and act like teenagers and don't care to ty spending the rest of their lives taking care of their children.
This has to be hard to deal with and it's a really hard and impossible situation because it's your mom. Normally I'd ask you to talk to her about it, but it sounds like you already have and it got you nowhere. What I really think could help is maybe writing her a letter explaining everything you're feeling. That way, you can get everything in that you want to say without her interupting or calling you names. What you should say is how you really love her, but you wish that she could give you compliments and be proud of you instead of calling you names and putting you down because it hurts.
Now, a lot of times in fights, you'll probably say 'I feel like you hate me' and she'll argue it and say, 'oh come on, I don't hate you.'
That's when you need to say, 'Ok, mom but could you please prove to me that you don't, because I really do feel that way'
And when she starts to call you names, start to say, 'See mom, that hurts that you really think that I'm a retard. That makes me think you dislike me and that hurts me a lot'
Something tells me that saying all of this won't work either. But I can't sit here and tell you to deal with it because it's damaging you. You really need to check with a friend or a family member about living somewhere else with them. Explain your situation to a friend and that might help.
I don't know if this will help, but maybe we could talk about this and I can possibly say something to her on her MySpace in a private message. I know this idea sounds wrong, but maybe if you gave me your screen name along with your feedback, we could get to know each other and find a solution. I just think that maybe if she could hear it from someone else it might work. I wouldn't insult her or say something wrong, I am mature and I'll be mature and try helping you through this. If you want to talk to me about this, heres my screen name if you'd like to instant essage me first:
Evanescence0o01 & my E-mail: xx_Erin@yahoo.com
If you don't want to talk, good luck with you and your mom and I hope you can find a better solution.
-TheTeenGirl
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