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I really care for a guy that I work w/ & have for a long tim
18 years old/female.
K, this is the situation I am in. There is this guy that I work with that I simply can not get out of my heart. This is the 4th year I have worked with him, and for all of that time I have found myself attracted to him in a big way. At first I just felt like it was an adolesant crush, I mean I was 14 afterall and crushes are not a rare thing at that age, they come and go. But this one came and has yet to go. Anyways, quicknotes version- He is 2 years older then me and impossible to read! I am oblivious to flirting-incoming or outgoing- and don't know how to tell if he has feelings for me too. Most of the time I really just wish I could forget about him, but something won't let me. It's not like an obsessive kind of thing where I think about him 24/7, he just seems to find his way into my mind in the quiet moments or when I'm admiring a beautiful sunset or watching waves break on the ocean I wish he were there to see it. But yet thinking of him often makes me sad, and sometimes even angry or frusterated. If I'm not even sure how I feel about him how am I supposed to tell how he feels about me? And how can I tell how he feels about me? I'm sorry this is so long I can just use all the help I can get. If LOTS of people could all give me their opinions and advice it would me great!!! I will rate you.
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This is weird because im kind of in the same situation as you but the difference is that i am 14 years old hes 13 but i havent known him as long as you have so i totally relate.Just try to make conversation and see the things that you both have in common and just see where friendship and trust can take you and if it doesnt work out maybe its not meant to be
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A.K.A ZEN*PSHYCO
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You know what I think? I think that you really like him a lot but feel frustrated and sad and angry because you don't know how he feels and you don't know what to do about it. You probably also wish that after 4 years, you had some sort of sign.
Here's the thing about guys. They're not that good at taking hints and the shy ones will often be unreadable. This is why sometimes you have to take matters into your own hands and take the risk of telling them how you feel.
In most cases, I would say that it might be better not to risk your friendship over something like this but after 4 years, you have got to do something about this because after all this time, working around him must be something like Chinese Water Torture!! I'm sure you're desperate to know once and for all how he feels about you and it's pretty clear he's not about to leap out and tell you how he feels.
Try just having a general conversation and then just ask him if he fancies a drink after work or on the weekend. If he says yes, wait until you are out to tell him. Yes to a drink, by the way, does not necessarily mean he likes you. However, once you have him alone, out of a work environment, you can build up some courage (Dutch Courage, if need be, as long as you don't get carried away!)and then just tell him that you really like him and have done for some time and you need to know how he feels about you.
I know it seems like a huge risk but believe me, after all this time, it's more of a risk to you NOT to tell him than it is to get it out in the open. After all, if he doesn't feel the same way about you, you don't need to waste any more time pinning him as your Mr Right and you can start the process of getting over him and moving on to look for the guy who really is your Mr Right. I promise you, if this guy isn't it, he will be out there, just waiting to be found.
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You probably won't know how you really feel about him until you go out with him.
Do a lot of talking. Ask questions, get to know the guy. If he doesnt seem to be dating anyone ask him out for coffee or a coke. See how he responds. :)
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well if your good friends then start out by asking him if he'll go with you to like.. get your mom a present at the mall or something.. something where he wont suspect that you like him a lot and go from there.. if you have a really good time there you'll know hes the one for you and maybe you can ask him if he wants to do that again sometime.. in my opinion thats the best idea because then you can see him again and he'll think its casual.. just make sure you look casual yet really pretty so he thinks its just friends going to the mall together
idk i tried my best and this is a tricky situation but seriously GOOD LUCK :)!
<333333 allie
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