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my best friend
im 13/f
my 2 best friends are like obsessed with their boyfriends. im single and they think that i dont know what its like to have a boyfriend. i do. lately they have been ditching me for their boyfriends and yeah i understand and all but they think they are in love and everything. yeah and i am jealos and it kinda makes me mad that even when they tell me that i come first they never act like it. i know when they break up there boyfriend they are gonna need me and illbe there for them, but they are just gonna ignore me again. i know i should talk to them about it but how?
thankss in advance xo
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
This happened to me and I have also done this. My last bf I was with I was in love with, and I wanted to spend every second I could with him. We hung out ever single day and talked on the phone all the time. But whenever my friends wanted to hang out I always said I was busy, or I promised my bf I would hang out with him today, or invite them to hang out with me with him. Sometimes I would even say I would have a girls day with my sister and best friend, and then we would all go shopping, and conviently he would show up and we would split off, leaving my single friend and sister to hang out with eachother. See the problem was that I didn't want to blow off my bf to see my friends, even if it was for one day. And I didn't want to blow my friends off either. SO I was stuck in an awkward position. Another reason I had an issue with being away from my bf was b/c we always saw eachother and I liked that, and I thought that if I didn't hang out with him one day, that he would hang out with one of his friends, which made me nervous sometimes because some of his friends steal stuff and are reckless. But I soon got over that idea and started realizing that every relationship needs space for you two to be apart. Me and my bf are going to be apart for 10 days and it hurts me to know he is going to be 1000 miles away, but I learn to adjust and realize it is not healthy to be hanging out with my bf 24/7. I need to be able to balance it. You should tell your friends this. Let them know you understand why they hang out with their boyfriends alot, and that you always be there for them no matter what happens with them and the guys they are dating. But also let them know, that if you are going to be there for them, that they should also in turn, be there for you. You guys have best friends for a while, and that shouldn't change no matter what. Tell them that you want to hang out once in a while like old times, just all of you. Let them know that you understand about the whole bf thing, and that you would probably be the same way, but that even you would try to make time for your friends. Tell them that friends will always be there, guys will not. The friend of mine that was single when I pulled that, is now in a relationship. And she always blows me off to hang out with him. Now her opinion has changed and she understands how hard it really is. But now I realize how it feels to get blown off by your friends. It is not that they aren't your friends, it is that they are becoming too involved with themselves, and that is never good. Just let them know how you feel and hopefully they will understand and try to be there for you. If things don't change, focus on other things, and stop asking to hang out with them if they continue blowing you off.When they need a shoulder to cry on they will come running to you about it and you will be there for them, like a good friend. Of course you might feel used, and mis-treated, but it is alot easier to understand when you've been there and done that. The only thing you can do is talk to them about it. But do not fight with them about it. Never make them choose between a guy and a friend. Just be a good friend, even if they aren't being a good friend right now. Maybe someday the table will turn and they will be in your position and will see how it feels. Good luck hun, and if you need anymore help note my inbox back. Sorry this response was so long lol.
~Sherah
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Friendships are very important and if you want to keep it, you could try showing that your happy for them. Tell them how you feel about all this happening. Tell them you want to be treated like a best friend. If they do come to you when their boyfriends break up with them then go to you and soon ditch you again, they're taking your friendship for granted. Try hanging out with other people who'll treasure your friendship as you do.
Hope things will turn out for you and your best friends! Good luck!
Later!:)
♥teen13
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