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Seemingly hypocritical friend.
This might get a little lengthy.
My friend and I got into this argument last week in which we realized we both thought the other a bad friend and we had been kind of been unknowingly avoiding each other because one thought the other would be a bitch and all of that fun stuff. Typical female passive aggressive bullshit. We talked it out and made up. Then I invited her to see this concert with me of one of her favorite bands, since I had some free tickets.
Today we were sitting in English and she starts ranting and raving about how shes going to a really good place to eat right after class gets out. We both don't have any class after English. I kind of hint that I want to go because it's my favorite place but I just assumed it was a one on one thing with another friend so I didn't come on too strong. 10 minutes later she brings it up again and says to our other friend, Hey you should come with me! I'll sneak you out... just ditch the rest of the day! (she doesn't get out early like us).
So let's recap. I just saved her 30 or 40 bucks by taking her to this show with me tomorrow, plus I'm going to be giving her a ride, and she knows I had nothing better to do and could have gone to lunch with her, and yet she sits there and begs this other girl to go, and she said last week that *I* was the bad friend.
I assume I should confront her about this before the show so I don't have to spend the whole time with her being pissed off... but I just wanted to double check I was being reasonable and maybe get some pointers on how to go about starting this.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
you saved her $30-40? Was it a nice thing that you did for her? Or does she OWE you for it? Obviously, if she doesn't appreciate it, you don't want to be dropping money on tickets for her... but that's a different matter.
As for the lunch thing; don't hint, ASK. I mean, if you really want to go, just ask, right? Some people are really dumb. You can throw hints and clues and even suggestions and they still don't pick up on it. Sometimes you HAVE to ask.
I would definatley talk to her about it though, it's good to talk and get stuff worked out. And if during the course of the conversation she says something you don't like or agree with DO NOT raise your voice. Bite you tongue. Some of the best things I ever learned from people I did by just listening.
Hope all goes well with you,
-Evan
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Yea sure you saved her $3O or $4O bucks on the concert tickets, but maybe she didn`t invite you because she`s already doing something with you tomorrow, so she invited that other girl. It`s not like your losing a best friend or a friend or anything, so don`t think that at all. Maybe before the show starts, confront her about how it made you feel. How you kinda hinted that you wanted to go & just hang out & all that. Try not to seem all like, kissing her ass & hopeing that she invites you to every little thing that she does. Just remember that you can have more then 1 friend. Also remember that she wasn`t the only one bitching && stuff. I`m not saying that everything is your fault. I`m just saying their's 2 sides to everything.
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if you dont think talking to her before the show will cause any problems during the show.. then i would have a talk with her before.. just say basacally exactly what you said above..tell her you felt really left out by her inviting the other girl instead of you..
if you think that talking to her before will ruin the show for you guys.. then maybe after the show talk to her about..
hope it works out.
♥
manda
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