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my true love needs a "break"
okay... so me and my boyfriend were dating for two years we had a GREAT relationship we were best friends, and loved eachother very very much!but the last month or two of our relationship he was starting to feel like "distant" from me and so of course i asked him about it and he always said nothing or i dont kno.. and i didnt want to annoy him about it so i let it go, but then he told me that he thinks he needs a break not just for him but for me too! and that last 3 days and i cried the whole time and he told me taht it was too hard and it wasnt worth it and that he loved me so much.. and so everything was better. then we go out of town for a week and i felt once again "distant" from himyet AGAIN! and the next day that we got home i talked to him about it and i didnt kno that that was going to be the end.. but he just said that alot of things are going on rite now and he wanted a break.. just a break!! and then i saw messages on the famous myspace from him and some girl and they started before we even broke up... and i got upset.. and then i just assumed that they mite like eachother...and i got over it.. whatever! but then i found out that he had been lieing to me.. he took her to the movies before and to parties and stuff..and i kno that we werent going out but we were still GREAT friends and we still told eachother that we loved eachother.. and regretfully we ahd sex, so of course this hurt me... and when i confronted him he said that he didnt kno what to say and tahts why he lied about everything... and trust me this is not the guy that i kno... he has NEVER lied to me. but then this so called break turned into a thing where he wanted to live his life.. and he still loves me but he is a senior and he has never been with another girl.. (i was his first EVERYTHING) and stuff.. and that of course jsut hurt me so bad... and now we are friends but he goes over to that girls house, and he tells me and even she told me taht they dont like eachother like that.. but they hang out by themselvs all the time! and i hate it.. and i kno that i shouldnt.. but i do. and he tells me that he loves me.. and he even cries whenever we talk about us.. bc he says taht he scared bc he mite be messing up the greatest thing that he has ever had.. and when i ask then why are you doing it.. he says he has to find out... =/ and i dont kno what to do.. we still hang out and stuff.. but it hurts me.. and i dont want to care but i do.. and i just want to be with him again... and i kno that is selfsih of me.. but i just cant help it.. we were soo happy....=( so can someone please give me some kind of advice.. i dont really kno what im asking for exactly.. just help!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Try dating other guys. Nothing serious, nothing to make him jealous, just to see what's out there. That's the problem with high school relationships- people can fall in love, but sometimes they can't help feeling like they're missing out on the fun part of being young- dating around, not having to be serious, etc.
Don't doubt for a second that he loves you. He's just confused, and as much as he's hurting the both of you, sometimes you have to experience things with other people to realize how much you don't want to be with them. This is so corny, but think of Cory & Topanga from Boy Meets World. They had to break up, kiss other people..& realize that there was NOTHING that could top what they had. It's just like your situation.
It's nice for you to be understanding, but you're not expected to be a saint, either. Don't let this go on too long-- if it takes him that long to realize that you're the only one he wants to be with, maybe it's best to move on. After a while, I'd suggest having a talk with him & laying all your feelings out on the table. Situations like these can make or break the relationship. I wish you the best of luck & I hope he realizes that you're the only one for him!
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Alright well this seems really familiar. Ok well me and my girlfriend went through the exact same thing. Let me help you by telling you my mistakes. Just because he starts talking to other girls don't bring other guys around just to make him jealous because it will work and thats not always a good thing or a bad thing just depends on the guy. Don't ever no matter how bad it gets say mean or hurtfull things to them or behind there back because right before you sleep at night it will always be there reminding you that you are prob. the reason your not back together, even if its not true. But the biggest thing of all is time, do your thing experiment go out on a date or two with a guy friend just remember don't rub it in. If the guy really wants to be with you, which is what it ultimately comes down to, then he'll see how much your hurting and hopefully, for the sack of your relationship together, come back like the butterfly you set free only to have it return.
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