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I Just Don't Get It.
Hi,
I have a dilemna. I have been dating someone for 9 months now.. he is in the UK and Im in Canada. Things are great between us. We get our usual squabbles now and then, but wat couple doesn't. Neways recently I had called him up at his work and asked for him. I got his father on the phone and he repeatedly told me to stay away from him becuase of so called caste differences. I am Hindu Punjabi and he is Hindu gujrati. I have mentioned this talk to my bf. and he told me not to worry about it and that he will sort things out.. but wat I don't get is why does everyone I get involved have this same attitude about caste and or religion. It is really frustrating.. Why can't parents just accept it and be happy for him/her. Any thoughts on that? and..how can I just egnore his father's words like that.. It hurts me alot.. for him to think like that.. I have never seen him in person nor does he know my personality.. I just don't get it
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
if you gyes like each other it shuld not matter your blelefs . i have 2 friends that are diffrent and thery are together and married. so just let you heart gyed you and you wont go wrong.
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Not everyone is open minded. Even more so parents when it comes to their offspring. Parents want to be in control, exspecially ones that arn't open minded and don't realize that their offspring are seperate beings with seperate morals and values. Like you said, his father doesn't know you all, all he knows is that you're different from him and he can't accept that, which is his problem, not yours. Do you care that your boyfriend is Hindu gujrati? I don't think he cares either, side's you're not dating his dad. Just ignore the ignorant.
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Parents with a strong cultural or religious background aren't easy people, and situations like this often end up in their children being forced to chose between their lover and their family.
I know it's hard, but try not to be angry about it, and don't let it get to you. Rahter feel sorry for him. Your boyfriend's father grew up with these ideas, they are embedded in his vision on the world, and the older you get the harder it is to change that. It's part of who he is, and though it sucks, you can't really blame a man for holding on to something he was brought up with and believed in for all his life.
It's very hard, and there's no easy solution. Trust your boyfriend, but don't forget about the subject and try talking about it with him after a while again. If the two of you are serious about your relationship and plan on marrying, be prepared because it might end up in some painful situations. But have faith, true love is totally worth it.
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