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her... & her bf
this is long. i rate high for good advice ;D
okay, i've known my best friend for about 4 1/2 years. were extremely close. i can tell her anything and shes the same way. were practically sisters. im a year older than her.
shes been going out with her boyfriend for about a year (they had their anniv. last weekend) , but theyre not that close at all. they only saw eachother twice over the summer, and each for like maybe an hour at the most. and i was there too. they dont act like bf & gf at all. they never go out, hang out, or even call eachother. yet, they act like their sooo in love. hes cheated on her like 3 times, and shes known about it. he even liked me before. she doesnt realize that she can do sooo much better than him. he always talks to her about getting married and stuff .. ( theyre in EIGHTH grade ) and i know she doesnt want that. shes not ready for a serious relationship. she still has years ahead of her to date and everything else. also, she wont stand up to him. if he does something to make her mad she wont say a thing about it. and after it gets bad enough, i will. im not the type of person to sit back and let people run over me, or other people. which causes fights, because he thinks its not my place to give him advice on his relationship, which i agree that its not. but if shes not going to do anything about it and shes not happy with him, then its just making her feel worse. i honestly think the reason she wont break up with him is because shes afraid of change. she'll feel empty or something when she knows shes not 'dating' him. also, practically all of his friends are girls, and he'll invite them to hang out before he will her. they've only been on one date without any of her or his friends. and they've barely kissed. and he doesnt even save her a seat at lunch, or talk to her between classes, or anything. hes so mean to all of her friends too, me in particular. once, he told her that if they got married and i came over that he would shoot me and tell the police i was breaking in. immature, i know. then he had the nerve to ask her if she'd divorce him after that. why would she want to be with him after that? hes really controlling. i want the best for her, and i know this isnt it. she knows i dont like their relationship, and no one else does either. i dont know why they stay together..
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i would serously have a heart to heart with your friend, maybe take her out other places and try and get her to meet other guys. this one sounds like a real looser, and sounds like its probley been more than 3 times he has cheated on her. other than talking to her thiough there isnt any way to change her mind for her, so hopefully she dosent have to get her heart broken the hard way. you are a good friend for caring so much, just continue to be a good one and be there for her when this will oviously happen to her.
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Okay i know you are bestfriends with this girl but you can say something to her to get her attention about the subject., but never interfere with it. Dhe controls her relationship. Just give her a heads up and maybe she will do something about it.
Good Luck!
Crush Hottie
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Maybe you're over-reaccting... If shes your best friend, you should let her do what she wants. It's her life.
But if you really want to help (and I bet you do, you sound like a very responsible person.) I would really just talk to her. Ask her how she feels about her boyfriend. If she says shes fine, and she likes it, maybe you need some evidence that her boyfriend isn't the right guy for her to go out with. Tell her that you really care about her and that you want the two of you be a safe and happy couple.
Ask her to bring the topic up about how he feels to be with her.
If shes afraid of change, she should break up with her boyfriend!! I think that he's made her change after all. You should be there for her and tell her that you will always be there for her. Change is good, sometimes, but you can't expect yourself to stay the same throughout your life..
"he told her that if they got married and i came over that he would shoot me and tell the police i was breaking in." Wow.... Very immature... Just ignore hime, tell him what a jerk he is and that he doesn't deserve someone like your best friend.
Well, Good luck!!
-Sk8trash
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You should sit her down and have a talk, and tell her that there's someone better for her out there. And since she's only in the eighth grade, she has plenty of time before she needs to think about marriage. You also need to tell her that she shouldnt be controled by him. She's her own person and doesnt need to be treated like a dog. And if shes afraid of not having someone else, then that's okay, she just doesnt need to be with that guy, and maybe she needs a break from dating all together. And you know what, I bet there is a guy at school who likes her, and will treat her better than her so called boyfriend does. You never know. And that dude sounds like a total ass. Well I hope this helped some.
<3 Zoe
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Wow, okay, well...
It seems to me like your friend won't break up with him because she thinks she won't be able to get another boyfriend. I agree that she's WAY to young to be talking about marrage, but you REALLY need to let your friend know that there is someone else out there for her, and she doesn't have to stick around with him. He seems way too controling.
I'll say again, I think she's just afraid she won't find anyone else, and you need to prove to her that she can and will. Good luck!
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