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Hair
My hair is around two feet long, and it really is a pain to style in the morning because I want to do something nice with it, but it always ends up looking puffy and large from the amount of hair or back in a braid like it always is.
I would really like to cut my hair shorter to make it easier to manage, but I think that my mom is emotionally attached to my hair or something, because she refuses outright to let me get it cut. I do a type of classical Indian dance in which the hair is worn long, but everyone in my class braids false hair in and everyone keeps their hair short. Even my dance teacher when she performs uses false hair and keeps hers short. My mom uses dance as an excuse to keep my hair long, but I think I can braid false hair in just fine and my hair is just getting on my nerves. I really am getting close to go to the mall myself and just get it cut. I hate it long so much, but she is just not letting me get it cut! How can I get her to let me cut my hair?
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Well, you do have a dilemma, and I think you are right, your mom is emotionally attached to your hair. Well, let me start with this. I am in the beauty field, and I can say that ALL HAIR needs a healthy cut now and then. A straigt blunt cut, can give your hair some bounce and make it look more healthy. YOu can easily take 6 inches off, and you will still look great. What if you went for a trim (is that OK) and the girl "made a mistake" and took 6 inches off. Would that work. After she gets over the 6 inches shorter, maybe she will then be ready for something more drastic. I don't know, this sounds too easy you have probably already thought of it. Why do you think your mom is attached to your hair? Does she have hair trouble, and wish that hers was like yours? (you don't really have to answer, I am just thinking as I a typing.) You didn't say if you were Indian, American or East Indian. Both cultures value long hair on their women, so I am sure that your culture has a lot to do with it. When is dance season? Does it have a season that comes and goes, and when it is over, can you cut it for a while? Most likely it will grow back before the season starts again, of course I mean you should tell her that, and then keep it short and use the hair extensions.
The more I think about it, the more I believe that you should confront the issue with your mom, after all, what else is she going to be forbiding you to do in the near future. You sound like a sensible young lady. Don't put heron the defensive but find a quiet time to sit down and talk.
Ask your mom why she values long hair. Tell her that you do too, but you also value, intelligence, compassion, character....."you know mom, what is important on the inside." And a person should not be "valued" just for their hair. "Mom, do you think a person should be valued for their hair?" I can't imagine that she would answer YES to that. Now you have her in a quandry. She has to agree that hair should not be the most important thing. And that you have all these plans for your life...future in sports, or studies, or etc, etc. And even say that you love dance, but it is not going to rule your life, it is just a nice addition,that helps to complete you. And you don't need long hair to feel complete. But you do need your mom to accept you and trust you....to complete you. "MOm, I do need you to support me in order to feel complete."
How does that sound? AND Maybe by letting her feel that SHE IS HOLDING YOU BACK from reaching your full potentional because YOU want your hair short, and it will fit in better with your life style, and give you more time for studies, and sports and dancing and family and school, and all the other things that make you a complete person.
if you think you have her then, where you want her...if she is close to agreeing, then stop there. If she is still on the fence try this.
"You know what mom, I am scared too about cutting my hair. But I need to know that I can make these decisions for myself. And I need your support. "What if I HATE IT SHORT! mom." And if your mad at me on top if it, that would just be awful!"......"and it will just make me doubt myself and all my decisions in the future. I need your support to take this scary step, because I am going to be taking a lot of scary steps in life, and only with your support will I have the courage to do so."
WOW, I think I outdid myself there. Well I hope you think this advice is good, or at least are willing to try it. I do hope that you get your wish and are able to cut your hair. I know if I were your mom in this case, I would have a hard time arguing your logical approach to the matter.
I think it is good that you don't want to just storm off and cut it and want to show your mom some respect, by convincing her that it is your decision alone.
Good luck to you
Michele
thanks for asking a question!
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