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I have a friend..lets call her amber..she started going to her dads house after she got her first kiss from the guy next door...after that she and her sister would drive up and down this street (crusing kemp) and these guys would start talking to her..she is only 14 and she would give and 18 or 19 yr. old guy her phone number...she has asked me to go with her..but i come up with an excuse, because im not allowed to do those kind of things..a few days ago she met up w/ these guys in a white mustang..and her and her sis got int he car with them...that day one of the guys kissed ehr..and now they are dating..her and her sis, and a bunch of other guys were going to see a movie and her b/f called her and asked if they could skip the movie and go to a friends house..and she said yes...i told her she was gonna get in trouble , and she told me that he was a really nice guy and she didnt care...so she lied to her mom and left...I dont know what to tell her..and im worried about her..help me please!!
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I'm very sorry that it's taken me so long to get back to this question. I wanted to think about the answer, and then forgot about it.
Anyway, this is a complicated situation. I'm not incredubly sure if I can help you out very much, but I'll try my very best.
Your friend is getting into a dangerous situation. This guy might seem really nice and sweet to her, but he's still quite a bit older. He is going to expect more than a 14 year old should dish out in a relationship.
At 14, she should be having fun with girlfriends and boyfriends should be short and sweet. When she gets involved with an older guy, he is going to expect more. He is older emotionally, as well as physically. If she gets caught up in him too much, she will miss out on some much needed normal, childhood times. Like just hanging out with friends and talking about school and boys and homework.
I say all this because I had a younger girlfriend who was going out with a guy friend a while ago who had this problem. She started dating the guy when she was 13, he was 18. They did not break up until she was 17, and he was 22. She used to tell me about how she wished that she hadn't spent so much time with her boyfriend. She missed out on normal girl stuff.
Now this isn't even starting with the physical aspect of the situation. He is most likely going to expect sex from the relationship, and 14 is quite young to already be experimenting. But, then again, I have no idea how to actually talk to a 14 year old and make them understand that. I'm sure I wouldn't have listened to someone like me when I was that age.
Also... it's great that you want to be there for her and help her out. But you also can't get yourself too far into this situation. You don't want to endanger yourself.
I'm sorry I can't be more help with this. I'm not sure how to get someone to realize that they're in a dangerous situation. To actually get them to get out of the dangerous situation seems to be even harder.
You should ask this question to the entire site. You would be able to get more diverse answers that way. Maybe someone can help better than I have.
Good luck.
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