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I need help, does it hurt when he breaks the hymen?
When you first have sex, and the guy puts his penis inside of you, does it hurt when he breaks the hymen?
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As all your answers confirm, different girls have different experiences first time they are penetrated vaginally. I believe discomfort (which you may or may not describe as 'pain', as again we all have different thresholds in what we call 'painful') is often the result of involuntary muscle-tensing making it physically more difficult for the guy to penetrate you. There is a good deal of muscular activity in this region during sex. So you'd be as well to try and relax as much as possible when it happens. Make sure you have birth control all agreed and sorted beforehand and that you want to do this, as anxieties and worries make us tense and our muscles tighten-up accordingly. Also make sure you are physically 'ready' as well, and don't let your guy rush you into the penetration part. Lots of foreplay, please! Worrying about it hurting is (annoyingly!) likely to make you tense. Keep in mind that even if there is a brief discomfort, or even a little bleed, then having sex for the first time is not damaging or abusing your body in any way. Every sexually-active woman had to have a 'first time', obviously. Hope you have a very enjoyable experience. But if it's not exactly 'perfect' then don't worry. It's not a case of everything going wrong for you personally. If you find yourself getting really stressed, don't force things as you'll just get more stressed. Best to pass on this time and try again later, or another night.
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I am so glad someone else is giving the link to laci green as I do that all the time. Adviceman gave good advice too. From my experience and other females I've talked to who weren't afraid to chat about sexual stuff, I beleive there are females who do not need the hymen stretched out, some have used toys or their fingers for masturbating which has stretched out the hymen some. It may be enough but the guy still may be larger than how stretched out the gal is, and others are so tight that it takes a lot of patience and lots of trys to slowly stretch her out without the guy being able to enter with penis until enough time has been spent stretching you out at least first with fingers.
The only thing most females don't know about and I learned from another by being here on advicenators is something called a septate hymen. Look up the term on the net and see pics. So instead of a hymen as a ring of skin, its a strip going down the center of vaginal opening actually creating two much smaller openings. In some cases, even a tampon wouldn't fit in or was painful and still would not work. A male will not be able to get his penis in if this is the case, no matter how much lube or how relaxed you were.
Other than that, keep in mind that most young males are so excited at the prospect they get to have sex with a willing female that they do not go slow. So even if you are tight, there shouldn't really be any pain if he does it right the first time and too many are so full of lust and excitement and they are only thinking of themselves at that point so its no surprise that if he rams it in quickly that a female will tear, bleed and feel a good amount of pain. The pain doesn't last long though and the female body is able to heal any tears quite well on its own without any assistance.
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That should answer your question from sex educator Laci Green.
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Not being female I cannot give you a definitive answer. It all depends on a number of things as to how much if at all what type of pain you will have on first intercourse.
From my experience and knowledge gained, especially from listening to females answering this type of questions. The first variable would be the younger you are the more pain is involved for two reasons.
1. The boy has only one thing on his mind and that is to put his penis in your vagina. Most young boys don't have the knowledge or the sexual experience to take a girls virginity. They know the mechanics only.
2. Even though at a very early age even as young as ten you can look like a woman and even get pregnant. Your body is not yet ready to be penetrated by a penis. At some point during puberty chemicals are released that unlock you pelvis muscles which allow easier penetration by the penis.
The next variable is the hymen itself. You could have a thick hymen or thin hymen. It is even possible that your first lover is able to squeeze through the hole in the hymen that your menstrual blood drains through. Depending how athletic you are it is possible that you hymen is semi-detached or missing altogether. If you use tampons you hymen my have already been ruptured.
The only recommendation I can make to you and answer I can give is this. Be prepared for pain . Talk to your lover first make sure he knows your a virgin and makes sure he knows how to be gentle. Get some lubrication like K-Y Jelly and lube his penis and your vagina. This will help for as much as you may want this you will probably be apprehensive and your vagina dry.
Just as important is where you have sex. Make sure it is secure from intruders. That it is sake and you are comfortable. The last thing you want during this are your parents or his popping in or his or your siblings or friends. Your physical comfort is what I mean by comfortable.
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