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We had sex, now I'm anxious.
Hi guys. I'm 21 and my boyfriend is 23. We've been dating for about five months now and we had sex for the first time a week from yesterday. I wouldn't say I have anxiety but when I do something that could bring about major consequences, I tend to overthink a lot until I go moderately insane. I'm not on the pill, long story short-my mom is crazy and wants to know when I want to go on it and told me numerous times that the guy I have sex with, she hopes I choose to marry one day and blah blah blah so I just chose thus far to not to talk to her about me contemplating going on it yet even though I know I should soon. He definitely used a condom, though, but yet I still have that anxious feeling. The kind he has was thin and I even went to the crazy extreme (don't judge me) of looking at the condom afterwards to make sure it didn't break or anything and there wasn't a tear or a hole and even if there was, I heard that condoms have spermicide on the outside so if some does seep out it doesn't get too far. My period is scheduled to be in four days and I'm trying to not psyche myself out too much so the stress doesn't push it back.
I guess I just need some reassurance that even though I wasn't on the pill and the condom stayed intact that everything is going to be fine and that I'm not going to be pregnant. I talked to my boyfriend about my anxiousness and he told me that it is very unlikely for that to happen when it went the way it did with the condom still being okay and staying on the entire time, etc. I know I sound crazy, being 21 and still being nervous about these kinds of things but I just need outside sources to help me out and calm my nerves.
Thanks.
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I've never been on the pill, condoms have always been fine for me and my boyfriend. Trust me you're stressing out over nothing. When i lost my virginity, my period did get pushed back a few weeks but don't worry i wasn't pregnant, because we used a condom!! Your period maybe a little late due too change in the body.
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First of all you are safe ( no chance of pregnancy) depending upon the description you gave. Secondly, respect your mom and follow her instructions. No one can be more caring than your own mother and honestly I can give you a million examples to prove my point.
Lastly, control your anxiety. How? You have to find a way.
Good luck to you.
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Condoms are 85% safe when used correctly to prevent pregnancy. If you had sex 11 days ago you would be, for most women with in 3 days of the end of your fertile or unsafe period of your cycle. Most women , about 85%, ovulate between the 7th and w1st day of their period. This is the time they are most fertile. If you know when you ovulate then you know that 3 days before and 3 days after are the danger zones.
Taking all of this into consideration and assuming you ovulate in the middle of those 14 days. I would say your chances of being pregnant are extremely slim. If you do miss your period it will be from anxiety and stress not from pregnancy. More periods are missed because of stress over possibly being pregnant then actually being pregnant. So try not to stress yourself out over this.
As for your mom pressuring you to go on the pill; frankly it is none of her business. You are an adult and your sex life is yours and yours alone. If you chose to go on the pill it is your choice to do so and to when to do it. This is something you and your doctor should decide. You medical health is no longer something you mother can control or have access to your medical records.
Since you are sexually active and are highly concerned about being pregnant that you do go on the pill. The pill and condom usage together raise the potential pregnancy protection to 99.98%. The statistical .02% is an anomaly as nothing is 100% safe when it comes to pregnancy.
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