Member Since: June 28, 2011
Answers: 10
Last Update: July 4, 2011
Visitors: 1624
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i have stretch marks all over my body. I have brown skin, and the stretch marks are like a bit white. YOu cant always see then though. I have tried s. mark creme and lotion, tanning oil, etc..but it only gave me zits. It doesnt seen to fade. I KNOW they dont go away, but is there anyway to make then lighten? I cant get a operation, because its to much money, but is there any way? Please help. I WILL RATE thanks (link)
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Hello!
You can as you say use chemical products from a chemist, but ther are expensive and as you have said, often ineffective.
Paw Paw ointment is often cheap and is natural. It will not tighten the stretch of the skin where the mark lies, but certainly is likely to make the discoloration of the marks fade quicker than usual against your normal skin tone.
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If a friend ( a person who claims to be a friend) is terrible about returning phone calls or email. How often should one contact them until they do? Actually for fear that they may never call at all. Would it be proper to avoid them completely and just let them do the contacting and risk the friendship? (link)
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This "friend", I am guessing they have other friends and family. Is there anyone in particular they call off their own back regularly?
My guess is that there probably is.
If you are someones friend, and a close friend you call or catch up or email...You are close so you want to feel the presence of that person.
I feel that this persons priorities are else where.
I would stop chasing and see if they chase you. If they dont call, move on...Find people who reciprocate the effort you give them...
You deserve more than a one-way friendship!
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However lately I've had a lot on my mind.. For one my dad's health is getting worse everyday and there's no hope of him getting better because everything is a big joke to him... He just found out he had diabetes. My sis has cancer and 5 babies... My mom is as stressed as I am and she works 50-60 hours a week so she's not really here for me to talk to about stuff. I'm in college and I work part time and that's my only outlet.. I don't have tons of friends, but I'm just in over my head... Help, I need somebody.. HELP, not just anybody!! (link)
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Hello, It is not suprising to me that you are feeling like a "loner"...But, under all that stress and the weight of responsability on your shoulders it is understandable that a social life is lacking.
One thing I will tell you is that from what you have said it is clear you have your heart in the right place...Sometimes it is difficult to realise that we cant fix everything we want to, we cant make everyone listen to our concerns and take action on them, we cant do any more than humanly possible.
You sound like a caring soul who is missing out a lot already because of all you devote to others...
My concern is that you sound as if you may give up what YOU need because of your concerns for others.
What you have is rare, an open hear with the strength to make something out of your life...You are not a loner, you are just under too much pressure and stress to relax and enjoy the company of new people.
I am un well myself. I dont know the outcome of my health. I am 24 and home bound after an injury which confines me to the home. I have a mind that is strong and dreams...But I dont have a body that can walk those dreams for me...
My advise is that people around you can see you are trying and the best thing you can do for them is to help as muc as you can (as you are doing now) and make the most of a working body and an open heart that can and will do very many positive things in this world as long as it remembers about taking care of itself - YOURSELF...
Best Wishes,
Steph.
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when you are so far down how to find the strength to climb back up? (link)
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Let me tell you a little about my journey and how i keep going.
I first tried to commit suicide when I was 6 years old. My mother told me every morning when she dropped me off at school that I would come home and find her dead, gassed with her head in the oven. My mother had a condition known as Munchausens by proxy. It is when you make your child sick, for your own attention. Eg, poisoning them, trying to make them hurt themselves, letting others hurt them, or encouraging them to...
I never had an adult to look up to. Just my mum and my older brother who was a pedophile (and still is), the one mum let rape me since I was 4 years old.
I may have never had someone to look up to as a child and a teenager, but even being homeless at 17 and finsihing highschool on the streets. Washing my face and hair in the public toilets of the railway after a night of little sleep and making a 1 hour treck to school...I didn't have anyone or anything, but I didn't give in.
I am 24. I have epilepsy and PTSD. I am homebound whilst they find me medication to stop my seizures. I have been waiting two years to leave this house alone again...
I finished uni, I fell in love, I am engaged. But, I had an accident two years ago and have battled ever since.
It is me, the computer and this cold lonely house every week day, but I keep going. There isn't a day that goes past I dont think I want to die...
But I wont do it...Why? Because I have been through worse and I made it despite that. The answer is in that...Think of what you have over come, and realise your own strength.
I have spent a month in bed at one point and every minute was a living nightmare. I wanted to die...But, you might feel the pain alone will kill you, it wont.
Know you can always keep going...You wont die from the heart ache. But, why leave your life here...In such a poor space??? What if, you could have had so much more if you just waited and held on.
Take care of yourself...Steph.
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What are the best ways to better your personality? I don't like myself and my habits, style, and actions sending a message I never intend to send. I want people to be turned on by my personality, and not turned off because I'm not self aware enough of my actions and their message. I want to understand others more and respond with true intentions sending a message I want to be read. I want to win people over because I know how to approach them. I want to be likingly unique; not unique where society doesnt find me acceptable. I want to know if my style turn heads away and to turn them my way. I want to change being weird in distasteful ways. I want to be confident in myself instead of focused on my disgust of my exterior appearance. It not being perfect. I want good character and I lack it because my concerns are shallow. (link)
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Hello There!
I think that first of all you show good promise in the road to change. The fact that you have written this about yourself and asked for help means you really are aware of your faults and want to something about them.
It seems that the focus of your inner conflict is about your judgement of others. This seems to be the number one focus of your digust against yourself. Than you see faults in people based on their outside appearance rather than inside. Interesting though, that your hatred towards yourself is for the very same reasons.
The reason people turn their heads away is not your looks, but your attitude. You hate your appearance both internally and externally and it is often easier to blame your appearance than it is to blame who you are as a person.
I get the impression that on the outside you look fine, but you suffer from a warped perception of your body. When you look in the mirror you see your inner hate reflected in the glass as parts of your face and body you feel you need to perfect.
It is not the body you hate, but the eyes. Is it hard to look into them?
If you think about what you have done as a person which you regret and feel guilty about, that is where your charecter lies and the answer to the changes you need to make.
You were expected from a young age by those around you to fulfill their needs and often felt like you were not good enough. You hate yourself for not fulfilling them, but you were young and you did the best you could. They wanted you to be something you weren't and you dont need to feel guilty about that!
You need to realise that when you were a child and you were brought downby family, maybe becase you were a tom boy or because you didnt come home from school and support everyone else...You need to realised they were being selfish. They taught you that you had to be perfect, what everyone wanted...
They are the ones with the problem.
You need to address your past and find you. You dont know who you are right nowm because you try so hard to be what everyne wants you to be and hate yourself when it doesnt work out that way.
Your body is fin, you are a hurting soul. You are not a bad soul. Find yourself , I see your morals are in tact and surround yourself with decent people who can see and value that!
Best of Luck, Steph.
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Hi, I am 17 and female, and this is kinda long...
I get this feeling which I am sure is being depressed, but it doesn't last long like it should if I had depression.
For example, I read that if you have depression, the depressed periods usually last for at least 2 weeks. I am never depressed for very long, and definately never two weeks or more. Mine lasts maybe a day, or sometimes in a cycle that includes being sad for a half a day, then being normal or happy for the other parts of the day, and then the same the next day and so on for a while.
Also, I think that this may be caused by bi-polar disorder or cyclothymia, rather than depression, because I sometimes go into these really happy, hyperactive states when I am not depressed or just normal. Usually in these hyperactive moods I feel really happy, and I'm talkative and energetic and I have a disregard for rules, like I will be mucking around in class and I don't really care when the teacher tells me off or tells me to calm down and be mature as I am a senior student and all that. I usually just laugh when a teacher tells me off during these moods. Also, I may be in one of these moods and be mucking around during lunch, and I dont really care if I am annoying anyone, or if I am being judged by others, as people tend to judge you as weird when you are acting really hyperactive or fooling around with your friends and they are all sitting around doing nothing.
So do you think I may be depressed or I may have bi polar disorder or cyclothymia? Or could I possibly just have really extreme mood swings? (link)
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Dear girl,
You dont have bipolar. The reason is that like plain depression, bipolar episodes of mania and depression are both of long duration.
Eg - a person with bipolar will have 2 weeks straight of constant manic behaviour without a fleeting second of calm. You said your cycles are much shorter. Also the depression comes as a lapse of energy after several weeks of mania and you collapse as your body and mind is tired.
You also are 17. They do not diagnose or (shouldn't) rather diagnose you with any long term chronic mental illness until you are in your early 20's.
What you describe is more like "Borderline Personality Disorder". Your expression is much mre like this. A person with BPD (borderline personality) has mood swings like mania and depression that can last between seconds, hours and days but not weeks for mania, only depression. They have a disregard for rules and outhority and often place themselves in dangerous situations (eg, unprotected sex, binge drinking, drug use, stealing from shops, cutting, getting involved in fights, making poor choices, etc etc...)
However, though this fits your situation perfectly BPD, you are 17. BPD is common amongst girls to onset around your age and is commonly associated with an experience or expeiences of deprivation or assualt from parents or close friends, relatives etc. There is a high frequency of sexual assault as well as bad parenting in these indiiduals. You ofte feel ignored and deprived by your parents, guardians or family.
If this seems your case, you need to engage in treatment ASAP, as you may be able to reduce your chances of officially being diagnosed with this mental illness when you are over 18. This is a condition which is common and rarely completely treatable un less trated early on in youth.
Most adult psychiatric female in patients suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder.
If you want more information, feel free to contact me.
Best Wishes, Steph.
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Music is an important part of my life. I know it one of the things I could never live without. I play two instruments and have a few hundred songs on my ipod(it's an old nano so it's almost completely full). I especially love to sing and play popular songs on the piano. I always have fantasies of how I can become a famous singer even though my parents would never agree to it. One day in the car, my mom, brother, and sister, and me were singing to a song on the radio. She was joking around about how we could have a sibling band, but then she was like, "Too bad none of y'all can sing." Just fyi, i sing alot in the car and at home. I asked her if my singing was bad, but the only answer I got from her was something about how I don't compare to some of the famous singers. Should I give up my dream to sing or should I just try harder???
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NO! What I can hear is that Music gives you a lift that other activities dont. You sound like you get a great release and will find that if you give up music, you wont cope as well with stress in life.
My advice is, you may or may not be a great singer, but you are passionate about music and play two instruments.
Consider music therapy as a career. This is when you help people maybe sick children or people with depression and disabilities or people who cant talk to express themselves and find hope through music.
This may be your music or theirs. Along the way you will gain more opinions about your skills from professionals (not your mom) and you will get the idea of what track you personally want to take from there.
Give people the gift you feel when you sing. SOme can only hear it, but they feel it and it makes their lives worth while!!!!
:) Best of Luck, Steph.
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the other night i gave oral sex , and the next night my throat was sore and red idid protect myself by usuing a condom, during sex but not ORAL SEX cud i have contracted and STD. i cant believe i did this. jst please help ease my mind cud it be an STD causing my sore throat ? (link)
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Hi there!
Well you said your throat was sore and you used a condom. So the chances are that you either (1) abraised your throat with the penis and it will be sore until the lining of your throat heals in the next few days or (2) you could be alergic to the rubber material of the condom.
Since the rest of your mouth is ok, I would say it is most likely you have un settled the thin outer layer of your throat and it will take a few days to heal.
An STD is unlikely.
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in which field i have to go...in engneering or in managment field...and i am from india (link)
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My answer is simple. You should never start a degree in management when you are young!
Experience is valued more favorable than knowledge in any working environment. Do something you think you will love, such as engineering (there is a world wide need for more engineers and you will grab a position straight out of uni and hen you have experience get into management. You may be able to do a post graduate diploma or certificate in management in a year at uni once graduated and your experience working within any field will boost your chances of sucess!!!
:) Steph.
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Hello, I'm 16, female. I've never had sex so being pregnant; not an option. My period comes not very irregularly but my mom always is like "oh, it never comes on the 7th of every month to the 14th?" Or something like that, sometimes I'll get it at the begining of the month or the end of the month to the begining of the next. I checked my planner from during the school year and two months ago it was the 6th to the 13th. Sometimes it doesn't even last a whole week. Why is my period so weird?
Tomorrow I'm goimg to Creation Fest and I don't know what to do because I don't know definately when its coming. What should I do? (link)
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Hello there!
To be honest, you are worrying far too much! At your age you are still adjusting horomonally and your period is likely to change in frequency over several years and even into your early 20's.
It is not abnormal at all for for this to happen.
Dont worry, it is just part and parcel of woman hood.
Periods can also be affected by poor nutrition. Not eating enough will reduce your ability to release eggs, so your periods will few fewer and shorter.
Being overweight can cause coditions such as Polly Cystic Ovaries. This is usually easily treated.
It is also normal for your period to only last a day or two in your teens or longer than expected. Dont stress too much unless you notice other signs or abnomalities.
Steph :)
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