This is the advice column of Meags227. All questions will be answered unless they are not suitable for children. Meags227 will judge how appropriate each question is. Questions are usually answered within twenty-four hours of receivance. Thank you for visiting this site and feel free to ask anything. :-)
Also, a special thanks to Miss Stephanie Bista, for without her this site would not be possible. Thank you, Stephanie!
Gender: Female
Location: Lisle
Occupation: Advice Columnist
AIM: Meags227
Member Since: February 17, 2005
Answers: 57
Last Update: July 21, 2006
Visitors: 6843
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SimpleSoupOfSilence
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if you have a problem with megan, you have a problem with me too. because as her best friend, i will not let her be talked to this way. UM A THREAT? how low can you GO? pretty low...you should be treated like dirt. and you are REALLY insecure with yourself. so just get over yourself. either be a big person and tell who you are, or shut your yapper. cause nobody gives a shit. and if you "punch her face in" you better be ready to get punched yourself. :-)
if you have a problem with any of what i just said, you can im me: oopsadaisy313 (link)
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Thanks, Whiskers. LOVE the input. Got that, Anonymous? I have not only a boyfriend but also other friends. I wouldn't mind taking you myself, but having more than one back-up just makes you look even dumber. I could walk away, leaving you to pick on somebody else, but I don't want to hurt another innocent bystander. You have a few options: Tell me who you are. Stop sending me these dumb "questions". Punch me in the face and get caught. Keep having me make you look stupid and immature. Have me bring in other people... You choose. This is a game, and it's your turn. Thanks again Whiskers! Hope I helped!
~Meags
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hey meags. im a junior at benet and i got your advice thingy from a friend. what should i do if all my friends are mad at me for something i never did. supposedly i stole my friends bf but he just likes me more. what should i do? he wants to go out with me but i don't wanna make her even more mad you know?
Rachel (link)
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First try and see everything from and outsider's view. Are you SURE you didn't flirt with him while they were going out? You're positive you didn't give any hint that you liked him, or any reason to dump your friend, or any looks saying 'go out with me'? Be honest with yourself. Any yes's to those questions and you owe your friend an apology. OK. Now, if you're sure you are totally innocent then: If you are good friends with her and she will get upset if you go out with him, then don't. Buds should always be before studs. Even if you didn't mean to "steal him" you may have done so unintentionally, and it would be a bad idea to date him and add to the drama over some guy. Meanwhile, I would try to explain to your friend the situation without sounding too cocky. Instead of, "He likes me better. I'm innocent. It's not my fault he wanted me and dumped you. Deal with it," try saying something like, "Look, I'm sorry about your breakup. I honestly didn't mean for it to happen, and I would never want to hurt you. If you really think I 'stole' him, then I won't go out with him and prove my trustworthiness." Or if you really like him and can't resist passing up the chance to date him, you could add, "But I know you are mature enough to see he just wasn't feeling the chemistry, and you won't get upset or jealous if I do hang out with him, right?" It's up to you whether you want to risk your relationship, but if you want all your friends back then stay clear of him. Hope I helped!
~Meags
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so hey i was wondering, with your newly changed website which by the way looks OH-SO-HOT....whos your best friend??? (link)
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Oh, why thank you. I love my new colors, too. My best friend is named Whiskers. Hope I helped!
~Meags
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I feel like sometimes i cant stand being around this person at school, becasue its like she doesnt like to be around me. I even joined a sport that i really dont like just so i can be with her more. Yet it seems worse now that i have joined the sport because she still doesnt want to be around me. The problem i am really having is that i cant stand to go a day without seeing her and it seems like she could care less if she saw me or not. But lately i think she has been trying to fix this, but i have always wanted to know why she seems to be embarassed about our reltionship and cares to much of what others think instead of caring about how she feels. Any help with these questions would be grateful. (link)
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Are you two going out? It seems that way by how you are wording this question, so I will just assume that you are. I don't know her (or you) so this answer is just to help, but I can't tell you how she really feels, because I don't know: Does she have the same friends as you? Maybe she would rather see you on the weekends and her friends at school, because she has many groups of people she likes to talk to, and doesn't want to leave anyone out. Do you know why she doesn't want to be around you in the sport? Maybe she has a friend (or friends) that she never gets to see and she wants to be with her. Or maybe she doesn't mind talking to you at the sport, but she doesn't want you to hold her or anything because her parents or other adults are watching and it seems awkward. I, personally, know that it can sometimes be weird when adults are around and watching. You say she is embarrased. If you two are going out, as I think you may be, then I doubt this is the case. It might even be the opposite, where she doesn't want to "show you off" in front of everyone. Maybe she feels too much like those people who make out by their lockers in front of everyone. Maybe there are adults/teachers at school, too, and this still feels weird. If this is the case, then she can't help feeling that way and you have to deal with and respect that. She probably cares a little about what others think- How many girls don't?- but I'm sure she still cares about how she feels. If she feels uncomfortable holding hands or being held in public, then she can't just change this, and you don't want to push her and make her feel odd. As for not caring if she sees you or not, maybe she is just bad at showing emotion or feelings. Have you ever considered that you might do the same thing? If you are in one of her classes or walk into one of them, do you say "Hey" or do you just ignore her? It might be weird either way if the people she is around are commenting on your entrance and saying, "Ohh! Look who it is!" Maybe you do the same thing to her without realizing this. I wouldn't be sticking up for her so much, but you said she seems like she is trying to fix it a little, so that's all that matters. I think you should give it time and see how things go, and if you have problems then talk to her about it. Hopefully she will talk to you if she has problems herself. Good luck with everything. Hope I helped!
~Meags
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SO here's my problem. I am a freshman in high school and so far its been ok. i have friends that went to my old school with me at high school, but those are my only friends. I haven't really made any friends that i hang out with on the weekends and stuff from my new high school. i want to make more friends from my high school but i am sort of shy when it comes to that sort of thing. it seems like for everyone else its really easy to make friends, but i just can't seem to go up to some random person and have a conversation with them. i feel like i am missing out on high school! what advice can u give me to help make more friends? (link)
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You aren't the only one that finds it difficult to make friends, so don't think that for everyone else it's really easy. I know a lot of people that wonder how to be more friendly and outgoing when they are shy. The truth is, a lot of (not all, but many) shy people don't even HAVE friends. Not just because they are hard to make, but they can also be hard to keep. I remember an Amigos retreat last year being all about Friendship. (If you went to St. Joan and were in Amigos, you will know what I'm talking about.) There was a list of things to do in order to maintain a friendship. This sounds stupid, and at the time I thought it was rather silly, but I have grown to appreciate all those activities we did, for a mulititude of reasons. Anyway, the main thing was communication. Being shy isn't a bad thing, but you need to talk, because friends share problems, hang out, and learn more about each other, which you can't do if you are too shy. Obviously since you still have friends, you are pretty good at this. Just apply it to making new friends. Try hanging out with one of your old friends while they are hanging out with their new friends. Make new friends through old friends! Get it? Just act yourself around new people. It'll take some time but I'm sure it'll all work out. Also, ask your current friends how they made new friends. I'm sure they can help you even more than me, considering I don't know who this is. Hope I helped!
~Meags
p.s. One last thing: now go and count the number of times I have said the words "friend" or "friends" in this answer. It has to be over 20, whoops...
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Hey Meags,
I am a twin and I am starting to get very annoyed at this. I feel like people think of my twin and I as the same person. We hang out together alot , but I can't always help that because we have the smae intrests so we end up in the same sports/activities. How do I become more independent. I am thinking of trying to find some new frieds (we have the same group of friends)and my old friends are getting kind of boring. The problem is I don't think I am very good at making friends. I have always had a twin there so I never had to "learn" how to "make friends." Do you know any twins and do you think of them as the same person? (link)
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Well, I know a lot of twins, and if I don't know them well, I tend to think of them as one type of person (Not one person, but one TYPE, because they aren't siamese twins...) However, the twins I know better, I think of them as 2 totally different individuals, even though they have the same friends and do the same sports. Try not to get annoyed, because that's normal for people to assume that 2 people that look alike think and act alike. People do the same for brothers and sisters (trust me, I know!). Don't leave your old friends for this reason only- leave them if you really don't like them anymore. As for making new friends, try talking to people in your classes or being more friendly, especially to people who you would like to get to know better. Also, talk to your twin and see if they feel the same way. Hope I helped!
~Meags
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lately i feel really distant from my friends ..like they dont care about me or want to sit with me at lunch and stuff. I dont know how to talk to them about this, because when i do they roll their eyes and call me sensitive. I could never tell them that i cry alot becasuse of this ..please help (link)
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There is a deeper problem here- WHY are you distant? Think about what you have done in the past; did any of this upset them? If you can't think of anything, then take a different approach. I know I say this all the time, and this is the most common advice, but talk to them again. Say you don't want to lose such great friends or ask if you are doing anything wrong, and if they call you sensitive say, "Hey, maybe I am, but it's better than not caring, which I feel like you guys are doing to me." Hope I helped!
~Meags
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Sorry its long.
My best friend is coming to my school, she went there once but people dont remember her because it was like 2-3 years ago. Well She is short and pretty and she has nice clothes and she is coming to my school on friday and I am afraid she is going to get into the popular kids in my school. How can I provent this? I dont want her to think the I am one of those friends who doesnt want her to hang out with anybody but me, you know. But I also dont want her to make bad choices on friends and then loose her other friend. (link)
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Talk to her! I would tell her the popular kids are bad, and she shouldn't hang out with them, but its her choice, but she should be careful and you care about her. I think she will understand, if you tell her how oyu really feel. Hope I helped!
~Meags
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well i have this friend and she is all nice and stuff around me...but when another person is around us shes different...for example today we went to abercrombie and i grabbed this shirt and she said she didnt like it...but then when my other friend came and said she liked it, she changed her mind...what should i do about it? (link)
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Many people are like that. I'm sure you even act different around different people, though you probably don't notice, and I'm sure your friend doesn't notice her behavior either. Try not ot feel jealous or hurt by her actions, because she probably doesn't mean to hurt you. Talk to her about it (in a nice way) or point it out the next time she does it. She will hopefully realize her problem and change it. If she doesn't, ask why she continues to be that way. It's possible she is jealous of you and has to show you up in front of other people, or she is insecure and has to act "cool" around other people, but she is comfortable being herself around you. Talking usually makes everything better, and if it doesn't, then shut up! Hope I helped!
~Meags
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