I am kind of new to this, but I think i might be able to help you with your problems. If you ask me a question and I do not know anything about it, I will tell you that I do not know much about that, but I will tell you what i would do in that situation. I hope I can help.
Gender: Male
Location: south-eastern US
Member Since: January 26, 2007
Answers: 21
Last Update: April 18, 2007
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One of my closest friends told me something about themselves, and it's like, really dark, most people wouls stop being friends with another because of this.
But, I accept it, she's still my friend, who i would do anything for.
She's afraid I'm lying about accepting it because her Ex-BF said he did then broke up with her a few months later, calling her an inhumane monster without a trace of a soul.
So she's afraid I'm going to do the same.
I've known this Person for almost 10 years now, she got me through some of the toughest times of my life, and for a logn time, we were each others only friend, I lvoe her like family, and I'm not sure how to tell her how much her friendship means to me, and How to convince her of the truth; That I still See her as an amzing beautiful person, And i'm always going to there for her. (link)
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OK, you should just keep talkin to her. If you don't call her or talk to her for a little while, she will think you don't want to hang out with her or talk to her. You just need to avoid the topic, and if she brings it up and starts asking you if you are still going to be her friend, keep re-assuring her, then indescretely change the subject. The best way to tell her how much she means to you is to just come out and tell her exactly what you think. It can be hard, I hav had to tell my friends stuff like that, and for some reason it can be hard to tell your friend how much you care for them. I don't know why, but it can be scary. If you dont think you can tell her to her face, jsut send her and e-mail or instant message. That might make it easier to tell her. Hope this helps.
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My friendship with a guy (best guy friend...or was...) is over...and i dont know what to do...i dont know what to think...i dont know how to feel...
im in so much pain...and right now i feel numbed to it...and that is really scary because i know its gonna hit me really hard later than...its happened before...but the thing that really gets me is that i dont think he notices anything is wrong...like he has no idea that our friendship is gone down the toliet or he does and he just doesnt want to do anything about it...he just doesnt care...
i dont know...any advice on this would be greatly appreciated! (link)
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Just try talking to him about it. From what you said, it seems like you haven't talked to him about it. Maybe he really doesn't realize that things aren't so well between you. Maybe he doesn't know how you feel. I think it would help you out a lot if you just sat down and talked to him about it. If you are afraid to do it in person, then you can do it through e-mail, texting, on the phone, there are a lot of ways to do it without having to ask him to his face. I noticed something like that was happening between me and one of my friends, and I finally said, "Is there something wrong between us? Because we don't seem to be as good friends as we use to." They said tha tthey didn't realize anything was wrong. What had happened was that we got different classes and didn't talk to each other as much. Now we are friends again. Just try sitting down and talking. It really does help.
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im 13/f. my two best friends are dating(a guy and a girl) and they asked me if it was ok i said yes and i feel like a third wheel always and if they ever brake up i dont know what id do.
what do i do so i feel better around them? what do i do if they break up? all three of us always went places never just two so they still bring me everywhere. i told them they could go on dates alone without me if they like but they say its funner with me. (link)
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If they are the same age as you, and I'm sorry to say this, but this is how I feel, they probably won't be together long. That's just how middle school relationships work. And for when they break up, just stay friends with both of them. Yes, there will be har dfeelings between them, but most of the time when stuff liek that happens the people will become friends again soon (by soon I mean 1/2 a semester to a semester). But if you feel like a third wheel, jsut say "Look, I don't feel comfortable when I go on dates with you two. I mean, I just feel like I am in the way" or say something along those lines. But for the most part, don't worry about it. Things will be back to normal soonner than you think.
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Ok so I'm a 16/m, almost 17. I have a great group fo friends, and were all pretty close. However, some of us arent AS close as we are with others in the group. Now I have been best friends with my friend, we will call larry, for 3 years, but have known him for about 5. Now he is growing closer to another friend in our clique who we will call bob. I am also close with bob. Both of them act really different when they are together, and to be honest i can't stand being around them when they are together. I also feel that im fading away from my closeness with larry. I would talk to him about it, but he can't exactly have a serious conversation. So what can i do? Am I wrong for drifting away from my once best friend? (link)
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I was in a similar situation. My best friend from 6th and 7th grade was getting more and more distant from me, and closer to the other people in our group. I don't really know how, but we started gettin closer again. I think what you need to do is try to get Larry to calm down enough where you can have a calm conversation with him sayin that you kinda feel like you are bein left out some. And no, you are not wrong. I don't think it is all your fault, but kind of both of your faults. I'm not saying you or Larry did anything wrong, but that you both started hanging out with other people. And that kind of stuff happens. I understand how you can think it is either all your or his fault, but it is really just part of life. I mean, you can't hang out with all your friends all the time, and you will probably have a lot of different best friends, and there is nothing wrong with that. But you just need to talk to Larry and try to get him to understand that you feel like you are being left out. I hope that helps.
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13/f. Im not sure how I like my friend. As in bff or bf. Weve been really close friends for a long time then he started saying bffs so I did to because I tell him more than my other bffs and he tells me a lot and were always there for each other. But then we flirt so much people think or say were dating or should but were not. He knows I liked him I know he liked me befor the party because we told eachother. but I have no idea now. I went to a paintball party recently. We both go paint balling a lot then at the party my team was my 5 bffs 3 of their bfs and him. I would mainly go with him. And we flirt so much that’s what im so confused about. He was showing off and when we separated he was looking for me? But im the kind of gothic violent rough girl and hes the kind of prepy nice guy. Other guys I used to like and they liked me would be rough im rough to everyone also. But hes to nice. Is that what it should be like. But now hes been wearin a lot of black and depressed. Does that mean something. But then we do joke or do shoot each other on purpose. he was talking to my other friend about something ‘top secret’. later on she started truth or dare. And it started out just my 5 bffs her and him and another guy. I kept doing truths I was just to nervous. I knew it was a setup. He asked truth to me if id ever take a dare. Then my bff asked truth to me if I liked him then truth to him if he liked me we both said no. I regret it. Everyone already knew anyway but im just not sure if I like him bf or bff? And ive never kissed or been kissed. That’s what it was supposed to be. I thought wed start taking it longer than just a ‘dare’ kiss like making out or something. I like him as a bf then bff then bf then bff I just am not sure whats wrong. Hes all I think about and write about.
i really need help soon. if i dont do it tomarrow it will probly never happen between us. we tell eachother alot of stuff and we both knew or thought before the party that we liked eachother. Do I like him as a boyfriend(bf) or best friend(bff). How does he like me? What should I do? How do you kiss? How do I change what happened? What else should I do? (link)
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your questions in order
1) I am sur ehe likes you a lot. I think he might be just as confused as you are. I do the same kinda stuff with this one girl at school, and I am having the same problem with her you are having with him. The best thing to do is let him know how you feel.
2) I kinda already said this, but I'll say it again. You should tell him how you feel. Just try going out and if it doesn't work, just try (and I am NOT in anyway trying to make this sound mean) to move along. I'm not saying to rush into another relationship, but just wait. It might pay off.
3) To kiss you just... kiss. I mean, there isn't really a right or wrong way to kiss. You just pucker up and kiss. It takes a while, but you will learn.
4) Unfortunatelly, you can't change the past. But you can fix the future. Just ask him if he likes you. It is gonna be scarey, but you can do it.
5) Just follow your heart. That is really the only thing you can do. If you like him, go for it, if you don't like him, then don't. Either way, you can't lose.
Hope I helped.
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16/f. My best friend, a guy, talks to me all the time about shit that goes on with him, like at home(his home life is very f***ed up). Mostly it's on AIM. And I'm really glad that he talks to me, cuz we have a history(long story) and we are best friends. But a lot of the time I don't know what to say in response. I'll say I'm sorry and stuff like that, but I feel like I have to say more. But like what? I just need him to know that I will always be there for him and he can talk to me about anything, and I'm sure he knows that, I've shown it. Do I need to say anything else? (link)
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You are doing the best you can, and that's enough. It's normal to feel like you want to do more, but you may not be able to. It really all depends on what is going on and how much experiance you have with it. I have a friend like you, and she has more problems in her life than i will probably ever have. But she still listens and helps me. You sound like an awesome friend, and I'm sure he is grateful that you listen and help him the best you can. I am sure you mean a lot to him as a friend. Sometimes people don't really need help with their problems, they jsut want somebody to know they have them. And usually they can only trust a true friend, and you don't get many of those in life, and you sound liek one of his.
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ok. 14/f. my life with friends right now sucks so much. i can't take it anymore. i have 2 different stories about 2 diffrent friends. ok, so my first friend.. we'll call her.. Lacy.lol. well, we have this huge science project to do. and our teacher allowed us to have partners. and me and Lacy have been friends for about 2 years now, so we're pretty good friends. we're in our science class together, so we decided to be partners together. well, a diffrent girl in our class asked the teacher if we could have partners from diffrent classes. and he said that would be ok. so we started doing more reaserch and stuff. well, in a different class that we have together today, she goes "ok, i have to tell you something but please don't get mad" and i said "ok, i won't" and Lacy goes "well, i think i'm going to be with "Tiffany" (changed name) because she didn't have anyone to be with." and i go "ok" and acted like i wasn't mad, but i really was furious. so now i have to do it by myself, cause my other friends already have partners. but i don't want her to find out i'm mad, cause i don't want to start anything, so what should i do? i don't want to say anything cause that would prolly make her mad. ok, second story. there is this girl.. "Lisa" and we were pretty good friends at the beginning of 8th grade. but she gets mad really easily about the STUPIDIST things ever. even if you say one tiny thing that is a little bit annoying. well, i'm almost positive i didn't do anything to her, and she has totally been ignoring me. and if she does talk to me, its usually really rude. but i'm starting not to care because i think she is annoying, and alot of our other friends think she is annoying. they have told me that before.and she is so despreate for friends its sad. lol. but still, what should i do? should i ignore her? i really feel like i can't trust any of my friends anymore. and its NOT just those 2 friends. what should i do about my friends? sometimes they seem to like me, but other times not. thanx. (link)
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First about Lacy. For her to ditch you like that was wrong, and you need to tell her that it made you upset, ans however else it made you feel. If you don't tell her, she will never know. And if she asks why you didn't tell her then and there, tell her the truth.
Now for Lisa. Since she doesn;t have friends, she might be a little dramatic about things, or that may be why she doesn't have many friends. But, if you do still want to be her friend, you should stop her and ask her why she is ignoring you, and that you want to know if you did something. Notice I said if you want to be friends with her, not your friends, you. Most people will not be friends with someone because their friends don't like them, and that is wrong. If you want to be her friend, then your friends should be ok with that. But if Lisa doesn't want to be your friend, just let it go. Hope this helps.
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