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Hi, I'm Sabrina and I'll try my best to give the community here the utmost advice :) If there are certain mistakes involving the way I convey the words, do pardon me. "If something is normal doesn't mean we have to accept it."
"Either you run the day, or the day runs you."
All the best in your future endeavours :)
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Hi, I'm a 16 year old girl and I have been struggling with anxiety for over a year now and I'm really getting sick of it. I've had nearly 11 or 12 panc attacks within the last two months. I find myself worrying about my breathing, I have pressure in my head and I always focus on my heartbeat. I have no history of any medical problems so I'm clueless as to why I'm so concerned, other than the fact that about two months ago, I drank a glass of Mountain Dew (and see I began working at a McDonald's and started drink coffee and tea and side ALL the time.) and I guess my body reacted to the caffeine and my heart sped up and I panicked. Since then I've started doing breathing exersises, but sometimes I just have this "unreal" feeling. Like, I feel spaced out? Is this a normal thing with bad anxiety? I'm really looking for an answer. (Also I have totally stopped the caffeine and excess sugar intake) any advice is helpful, thank you.
Although this may sound normal, it may exacerbate. Relax, people will go through this at some points of their lives. Anyway, try sparing a moment for yourself and diagnose your entire life starting from the second this anxiety began until now. Details by details.
Since you don't have any medical issues related to this, perhaps it's time for you to ruminate on your mind involving the way you think, your perception towards the surrounding world or your history. Before the anxiety struck, how was your life? What kind of event that has triggered the problem ? Examinations? Stress? Problems with people? Sometimes, the dominant factor that leads to this may be a portion of your history which has affected you in a big, big scale.
Then, my advice for you is to change your thoughts slowly towards positivity. Eschew pessimism, or hatred or any negative words. If you're interested, you could read motivational books and mingle with righteous buddies or so forth. Trust me, psychological/mental thoughts affect the physiological actions of your body. It's also good that you've started to do exercises and apply good nutrition. However, say that your mind is not directly involved in the disorder, then maybe 80% of the cause goes back to what you've eaten or drank.
Practice relaxation techniques consistently, and be optimistic. Be exceptionally conscious of what you're consuming daily and manage stress. You know yourself best.
Hi!
Im in middle school and I start feeling this feeling since November of last year. I hate my life so bad. I always feel depressed. I feel like I'm ugly, I'm stupid,I'm fat and many other things. Then, my friends, I feel like I don't fit in with them. Then, since lately, my boyfriend has been chatting with this blond haired b*tch after class when everyone was gone one day. I'm afraid my boyfriend and I are going to break up and he's going to kiss her. For some reason, we haven't talked since two weeks ago on the phone (He is moving next year). I'm crying while typing this. (I actually cry a lot) What can I do before I hurt myself badly. I'm sorry if you can't understand with my typing I'm just depressed and sad all the time.
Hi to you too !
First of all , you need to gain control over yourself and think of what actually happened before depression struck you . How were you on October 2012 ? What did you do or what problems did you encounter during that time ? What changed you from who you actually were ? Identify the answers carefully with full honesty . Maybe , just maybe , you failed in certain matters or there were people around you who judged you as dumb , ugly and so on and you believed them , or maybe , life was just giving you lemons and throwing hard stones and bricks towards you and for some reason , you were paralysed and were unable to stand up again . Still , you don't just need an insight and understanding into your problems ; you need to change them right now because no matter what people say , you're still you . Your physical beauty doesn't reflect the special , inner you which is your heart and who you actually are .
The thing is , everyone has a fragile heart and you're included too but you need to remember that the key to happiness is within you , it's already there in you waiting to bloom . It's not in your boyfriend , friends and more but you alone but you must believe in yourself . This is related to your self-esteem and confidence ; it's all about building them up again and making you smile (:
Don't cry now , think about it . This is your life , you were delivered forth to this world for a purpose and life's never free from trials and tribulations ! Perceive the hardship you're enduring as an experience to make you stronger in and out . Allow yourself to change , and don't listen to degrading words people say because truth is , people don't understand who you really are . Never , ever compare yourself to them , believe me . Whatever they say , they can't change you and let go of your past . You're still young and you've your future ahead . Try planning your time by making a journal with positive progresses day by day .
Try affirming yourself with positive words from now on because those words will determine your later actions and feel positive . Take a stroll in the park or any outdoor places , and look up to the sky and see the puffy , white clouds . You'll realise that actually , this world is extremely huge and also , beautiful with the greeneries , the wind gushing through and so on . Life's not about pleasing people but you , and this life is too short to be deeply sad . You deserve to see your sunrise too , right ? No matter how hard your burden is , you have the ability to go through it !
Another thing is , you can also try to become closer to your religion and pray for happiness and believe that you will attain it sooner or later and be independent . Honestly , no one knows whether your boyfriend will become your husband in years to come so please don't depend on him fully to give you happiness yet because the heartbreak you'll deal with will be huge and it can happen at anytime honestly . You alone can give yourself attention , so don't worry . At the moment , try thinking of the brightsides instead of the negative ones . Love yourself now , and believe me , you're beautiful :)) You can do this !
I have to admit, I'm very emotional. However, I get extremely scared when someone gets angry and do my best to please whoever is angry, even if I'm not at fault. I'm also extremely afraid when people hate me. I might not be at fault but...I just feel so upset and afraid. What should I do? Should I learn to let go? How?:( Thanks.
You can admit anything at all in this site so don't worry and just let it all out :) Dude, what i can say is you need to become stronger emotionally, right from the heart. There is no doubt that it's sometimes difficult facing people who're tempestuous but still, if you keep on blaming yourself for what you don't commit, you're going to lose yourself in the future so it's very important to change now. Right from this moment. Think about it. Maybe, deep deep down inside, this has something to do with your history. Ask yourself, did anyone in the past ever treated you badly or rejected you so bad or overlooked your innocence in life ? If the answer's yes, then you need to let go and change your perceptions towards the real world. From what i've read, i do believe that you're fearing rejection and at the same time, wanting acceptance from everyone including the people who don't seem to understand what you're trying to do. Don't worry now, try changing some parts of yourself but one thing which is really, really necessary for you is strength. Life is tough, and facing ordeals is one of the essences of it and you need to prepare yourself to face more challenges. The person you need the most to stand up is you alone. Try being less emotional and be happy, have gratitude. Be willing to change yourself now and be consistent in it because if you don't, you might stumble and it will be a lot harder to catch the pace. Love and respect yourself too ! Let the people say whatever they want to, but if you're totally confident that you're innocent and there are solid evidences supporting you, then don't worry. Allow yourself to be right. This is not a small matter, well at least not to me. This is about you and whatever you do now, the way you perceive the world and so on will affect your future. Let go of the past because the past has already left you. Your past doesn't need to be the same as the future right ? :) Hope, pray and give your effort. Remember, this is for your own good and believe me, you'll thank yourself one day for making a change but don't ever, ever give up. Start talking positively and turn down the Negative Command Centre (Voices of weakness and self-blame). When life gives you lemons, squeeze them and make lemonade. Hold on to righteous beliefs which can guide you. You can do this, believe in yourself. No one is ever perfect, so try changing yourself slowly and slowly but continously at least. All the best :)
I get these really bad headaches on the back right of my head and i always feel like shit, like nothing i do is ever good enough like a pressure to be perfect. And Ill get these random moments of sadness where all I want to do is lay in the dark and cry. Please help me, please.
This is the time for you to cry everything out now but stand up after that immediately . Don't tell yourself "I'm never gonna be good at anything." or "I can't do this ! i've had enough." , no no don't tell yourself such things which can ruin your love towards your ownself . Remember , life is not about pleasing others to the best , but to live life to the fullest . Life itself can't be perfect and there's a reason why all of us are imperfect , to show that we need to complete each other's life . You need to be strong and i am so sorry for saying this but i can tell that you're now in a weak and a very vulnerable state and if you can't control your sadness , you might do just anything to relieve the pain . Maybe before this you were once a strong , confident person but somehow something or someone in your life took that joy from you . So , this is the time for you to think of solutions and keep on praying to God . I know that you're trying to live every day happily , but somehow you just can't . Maybe your past has something to do with this but you know what ? It's never too late to change , stand up on yourself ! This is when the hard part comes . It's like someone who has been writing with his right hand tries to change to being a left-handed person , that's how hard it is and it takes courage , sacrifice , tears and pain , and immense strength . The best thing about this is that everyone has the ability to do it ! You have a choice to change your life , so use that choice . Don't be afraid to take risks , you might lose the pearl of your life believe me . Everyday , try to develop self-help and make sure there is a progress . Also , don't , never let people affect your life . It's your life , your heart , your mind , your hair , your arms and everything and they can't be in your body , only you can . Make your heart stronger . Get inspirational stories ! Don't be a perfectionist too sometimes for it might be a burden which brings pressure instead of beauty . If people don't like you , let them be . Be kind to everyone no matter how old they are , smile all the time . Move on from painful memories , be grateful that you're still alive . Be who you are . You are special in your own way and if you keep on trying to please others , then you need to change . Be kind to yourself okay ? That's really important . Be a positive thinker because someone who always thinks positively can get benefits from goodness and also extract benefits from calamities . Remember , you have the choice . Choose the best one for your life . Everyday brings us closer to death , so live it the best way you can and it doesn't need to be perfect . You'll get through this eventually but it only takes you as the key to unlock the freedom of your life , trust me . You can do it don't give up .
I hate myself...
Like I look in the mirror and cry sometimes.
Damn it, I'm even crying right now.
I don't even know what I'm asking.
Maybe I just needed to post this...
If this happens because of the people around you , then start being strong . Everyone has been through this and there is always happiness , only if you believe in it . Don't look down on yourself , be grateful that you're still alive although you're in deep pain . Everything has a brightside and think about it . If you keep on letting yourself cry every single day , where would it lead you to ? You need to start looking at yourself and be just who you are in a positive way ! You can change but maybe , you're not brave enough and is also afraid of failure , I can't tell but every problem has a solution . Appreciate yourself just the way you are and don't let people's opinions affect you . They don't know the real you . Make yourself concrete and harder . Change yourself now before you regret it all your life . If you believe in yourself and think yourself as a slave to God , then nothing's impossible at all . Be willing to take a risk and please carve a smile :)) you'll get through this phase , you will and Tiffany's right . Listen to this song "keep your head up - andy grammer" . I know this is long , but hey , I want to express my feelings too and everything depends on the choices you make . Don't be sad :')
My girlfriend can be surprisingly laid back at times and strangely overly anxious at others. She was afraid that her kidneys were failing last month when it was a much less serious problem, she worried that she had a brain tumor once when simply because of a headache, and she thought she was having a stroke last summer because he arm had fallen asleep and was tingling. Now, she's freaking out because some idiot on an internet site I warned her not to go to claimed that he was going to release a virus in the US that would wipe out the entire population, which is ridiculous, right? I told her that he's just a crazyass who probably didn't mean it and have tried to come up with other reasons it won't happen, but she won't calm down. Please help me. What do I say to her to get her to quit worrying about this stuff?
How bout you just spit out everything to her ? She really needs to learn the art of calming down and not think of the worst at any situation at all . Why don't you tell her "Look hun(i don't know the name) , instead of freaking out like this , why don't you just relax and think of the ways to solve this mess first ?" "You've been acting like this for so long and it kind of worries/bothers me . I really like you being calm and all so stop panicking about everything ! You don't need to worry too much and you still have me by your side so quit it , please ." That would be my dialogue but really you could just tell her the truth very softly , don't hurt her little heart . She's very fragile , i can tell that by the way she's acting . Just tell her the truth rather than comforting her with lies and bear the pain . All the best and i'm so sorry if this doesn't help .
A lot has happened to me this past 2 years, and about 4 months ago I occasionally started cutting and making myself throw up. the throwing up has stopped, but the cutting hasnt. Things have been really hard for me :'( I hate being like this. I'm always sad and depressed and the instant I get upset all i think about is a razor blad slicing my arm. I cant help it.. It's almost as if I'm addicted to the pain. I want to get better, but I feel like I can't. What should I do? I have massive anxiety too. Any ideas as to what's wrong with me? :(
Life would not be called life if there is no hardship in it and when you are given hard tests , they are there for you to overcome them . Don't lose to the problems you're having but instead , try to think in a more positive way . Think about it . Will cutting yourself clear the problems ? Don't think of the worst , but think more wisely because you still have a mind of gold to make decisions and a heart to have feelings , you know that . You need to get better , and like you said you do want it so instantly , think that you can have it . Don't listen to the negative feedbacks such as "Heck yeah like i'm gonna achieve it." , "I can't do this it's too hard for me and i can't bear the pain of it !" or even "Neh. I've tried to keep up but i failed so yeah i know i'm gonna fail again and i'm tired of it." . No way man that isn't the way to solve any problem and believe me that you can go through all of those problems and they require real bravery and unlimited courage and you will be absolutely joyful one day unless you start to give up on your life . When problems start to come , be the how-thinker . Think on how you're going to solve it , how to keep calm and feel relaxed on so on , it worked so much for me and please apply it onto your life too because life is too valuable to be spent on sadness and depression and hun , do love yourself ! Remember , happiness comes to the person who believes in realizing it . Forget your sorrow and never ever surrender to the problems again . There's no easy way out in this so be strong , dare to try and trust yourself . Why ? Because only you have the opportunity to change your life and do more and more good deeds everyday . You can win in this i believe in you ! Don't give up on your faith and think positive always . Always . It's never a waste to fail once , but it will be an ultimate failure when you start to give up okay ? Keep your head up . Your life is more to come and whenever you want to cut or harm yourself , think "I wasn't born with hands to do this !" and keep in mind that when your heart is telling you to release anger and tension through negative ways , that's not your heart talking . That's anger and look what it got you and everyone . It only brings pressure , emotional and physical pain , and of course , intense feeling of sadness and depression . Any good effect ? Nope (unless in certain circumstances) . Things will be hard now , or harder than ever but you have the ability to go through them . Make yourself malleable to positive changes , and believe you can do it ! Break your problems into smaller components and solve them one by one gradually , and never let anyone say degrading words to you because you don't deserve such ill treatment ! But if you've made mistakes , then be brave to apologize honestly . Being alive is already a miracle so be grateful . Don't be afraid to anything when it comes to achieving happiness and freedom ! Don't take this lightly . You have choices to change your life to the better , you do so don't make excuses . It is never too late to change :D ! I've been there so start to be independent and stand up in your own special way :DD
19/F
ever since i was little ive always been extremely obsessed with making sure my hair looks perfect or else i get very anxious and cannot go on with my day, and i feel ugly. i straighten my hair almost every single day and when its natural and wavy i feel so ugly, but when my hair is straight i feel prettier. i dont understand why this is, because my natural wavy hair isnt that bad, but i feel like with my face it looks weird. i feel like it makes my nose look bigger and i just feel so hideous so i always straighten my hair. I also dont understand this because i dont think im an ugly person, a lot of people tell me they think im pretty..and sometimes i think i am too, but other times i feel like i look so unattractive. im getting tired of wearing my hair straight every day of my life and my boyfriend thinks i should try something new with my hair once in a while instead of leaving it straight all the time, and he's right. Today i told him I'd leave it wavy for him when we go out to dinner, but i looked at myself and i just started crying because i feel so ugly. I seriously hate this i dont understand why i am like this its so aggrivating. I know i probobly sound really stupid for posting about this but I really just dont know what to do about it..it makes things for me so much more complicated. is there something wrong with me?
From what i've been reading , it seems like you are a perfectionist when it comes to hair ever since you were a little child . You want your hair to be 100% pretty . The fact is that now , your perfectionism has affected you badly because it makes you aggravate when your hair doesn't seem right . The question is , Are you willing to continue this behaviour of yours until you reach an old age ? Do you want your child to see in such a way in the future ? iI don't think so . One thing is that you need to believe that you , yourself are already perfect since the day you were born , no matter what . You will never get anywhere if you keep thinking that your hair is always messed up . Be the way you are and don't let people's opinions affect you (unless they do in a positive way) and never compare yourself to others . This is no small matter so you got to solve this quick ! Remember that you alone is special , everyone is and you can change it . You have the ability to change it but you need to be consistent and have the heart of bravery and courage to change yourself , and persevere it . Perfectionism in appearance could bring you attention , but it also brings you dissastifaction , aggravation , anger , madness , pressure and pain . Which one would you choose ? Plus you can style your hair in many ways . Change :))
Hii, So from past few months I've been so addicted to my cell phone that I just can't keep it away from me. I'm constantly on it using facebook, twitter and checking random things on google. I have my exams like in 20days but I can't concentrate. In back of my mind I know that I shouldn't be doing this but I can't stop myself. I get really uncomfortable if I stay away from it like 10 mins. I spent min 15 hrs on internet either on my phone or laptop. I feel like it has also started to affect my mental abilities. I'm really scared. what to do??? :(
I know i don't have the right to say this but dude , you need to change from this moment on . What i've been reading is no laughing or small matter ! It's time for you to break yourself from these social networks or gadgets and nothing is ever impossible . What i did last time was , i locked those things , turned them off and gave all of them to my mother because it was really hard with the mind keep on thinking about what was happening . Remind yourself that you need to concentrate really good in your studies because that's what important nowadays . Not the friend requests , postings , updates or videos . Also , make a change , like i said and doing that requires real sacrifice and consistency , and be able to control your activities . In this life , you're still young , alive so you must have a purpose and dreams and you got to live them , and trust yourself that you can do this . Sacrifice all those things for your own good mate ! Remember , success requires 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration , meaning that life has its obstacles and you are the one who needs to kill them ! Love yourself first and life is too short to be spent on pointless matters . Sorry , no offence but it's the truth :))
I feel like dying.I don't know what to do.So many responsibilities and i am not able to support my family because i have not achieved my dreams so that i can support my family financially.Sometimes i feel no body in my family cares for me but i know they love me.My attempts in building my career is falling again and again,I try to console myself by saying that may be i did not working hard like others.But how many times will i console myself.Nowadays i am asking god to take my life away.I am loosing my self day my day.
Don't say that ! God has given you this life for a purpose that's why you're still alive until now . It's never wrong to pursue your dreams but keep in mind that to go for the better , you got to make sacrifices for yourself , and be independent . Be able to stand alone and God is giving you all these tests and He would only give tests based on His slave's ability and you are strong enought to handle them , remember that . Things might be upside down and extremely bad , but time will pass . Break your problems into smallet components and solve them one by one with courage . Pray to God to give you enough strength and most importantly , love your life and be smart handling it and let your mind control your soul . Otherwise , you would be following your heart all the way through and nothing gets better . Stay strong , mate . I trust you .