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Q: My boyfriend has a friend that is gay, and they hangout ALL THE TIME. Last time they hung out alone his gay friend took advantage of him being drunk and they pretty much had sex. Well, my boyfriend is STILL friends with this boy. Is he bi, and just not telling me?

There's a good chance that he's at least bi-curious. If his so-called friend really took advantage of him, I don't believe he'd maintain their friendship. It's more likely that the alcohol lowered his inhibitions enough to allowed himself to be seduced into trying something he was curious about. As for him not telling you the truth, he's probably having a hard time admitting it to himself.

You have to decide whether or not you are willing to stay with him while he figures it out.

Q: So me and my boyfriend were on our scool email chat and he tells me that he is going to see his ex-gf from like 3 years ago, this weekend. I am super paranoid and jealous. His mom hates me and suggested that he go to the thing that she will be at, and said "Katlyn will be there". I trust my boyfriend but I don't know this girl and I'm worried. Also she will be going to the same church camp as him and I am even more worried. Am I being overly jealous or paranoid? Or is this a normal reaction? Thanks

I wouldn't consider it overly paranoid. Your feelings are perfectly normal, but if your boyfriend is truly trustworthy, you don't have anything to worry about. On the other hand, if you can't trust him, then he really isn't the kind of person you should be with.

Q: okay i had sex for the first time with my ex boyfriend while he had another girlfriend...i loved him and probably still do but it won't work out...the last time i talked to him he told me he wanted to be with me and so i met him that night and of course we had sex but it's been 3 weeks and i haven't talked to him...How stupid was i for giving in so easily?

He was just using you and he got exactly what he wanted. You made a mistake and it would be stupid if you let it happen again. If he really wants to be with you, make him end it with the other girl first. Don't disgrace yourself by being the other woman. You deserve better than that.

Q: okay well me and this guy had been going out for 8 months. Between these 8 months we broke up 3 times.
One night me and him were hanging out at a baseball game and i was pmsing so i was really moody. i had heard rumors about him and a girl but he denied everything. while we were at the game she called him they talked for a while and then got off. after the game was over he left and my cousin ((his best friend)) the one playing in the game told me he((my then boyfriend)) was going out with the girl who called him and that a week before they all went to the movies together and that my ((then)) boyfriend made out with her. i was really mad i tried calling him and getting ahold of him for like almost a month he never called. finally he sent something saying he was trying to make this girl stop liking him so the girl he was supposivley with told she'd fake go out with him. soon they're were pictures of the two of them on her web page and remarks like " me and my wonderful boyfirend' what really gets me is that just a few days before we stopped talking he told me that he never wanted to loose me again. he denies him and her going out still. but they go to the movies and leave each other messages like i miss you terribly and me and you are hanging out friday. idk what to do i still have feelings for him and we have been through soo much! why would he do this?? what should i do should i talk to him or leave him alone till he says something to me?? is he a cheater?? HELLPPP! tell me everything you think. this whole thing drives me crazy. thanks
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This guy sounds like he wants to have his cake and eat it too. He's stringing you both along. If he really cared about you, he wouldn't be messing around with some other girl. I think you already know deep down in your heart what you need to do. Unless you want to share your boyfriend, you need to dump this jerk. If you two are really meant to be together, he will come to his senses, drop this girl, and come crawling back. Make him prove himself to you before you take him back.

Q: This is strictly for the women on advicenators to answer. i am a male (21 years old) and I know it is typical of a guy to ask the question i have (in the title), and even more typical to be worried about it. i am not huge, nor am i claiming to be asking for a friend. i am average, maybe more, but i am thick. to make up for the lack of size, i give amazing oral until whomever i'm with reaches orgasm. my question is this; would a girl prefer a guy who is average but can really 'eat', or a guy who is well above average and only 'eats' about average? ( for those women who don't know, average length for a man is from 6-7" )

It really depends on the woman. Some women aren't in to oral, though I can imagine why. I think technique matters more than size. I mean it's no good no matter how big it is if the guy doesn't know what to do with it. It sounds to me that you know what you're good at, so stick with that. I doubt that you'll get any complaints, if you're as good as you claim to be.

Q: I like this guy, Nick F. I think hes realy hot and I think he like me. But theres a problem, he cheats on all of his girlfreinds. Hes realy nice to me and I realy like him. But my freind wentout with him and she says that he abused her. But she has been nown to lie about her boyfreinds. So I dont know what to do. Please help.
~ from needs help~

If you know he cheats on all his girlfriend, why would you want to put yourself through that? Think about it.

Q: Hey... ok, this question is crazy so don't say I didn't warn you.

I think I'm looking for opinions more than advice... and I want to hear what you all think!!

Ok, I am a 20 year old female and I am about to start my third year of college. I have a boyfriend that I have been with for about 3 years. We actually went out for 2 years, then broke up for 8 months because I didn't want a relationship, and have now been back together for a few months. He is deffinitely the love of my life, and we intend on getting married in the future.

Why in the future and not now? Well, he recently joined the army and will be in it for the next 4 years. He is now stationed across the country and is going to Iraq for a year soon. He visits as much as he can, and we have no problems making the relationship work. We always talk about getting married in 4 years, because that is when he will get out of the army and I will be finishing up college.

So what is my question about? Well, we got to talking the other day, and the idea of us getting married NOW came up. The reason this even came up is because if we do it now, he will get payed twice as much for being married and in the military. Not only that, but I will also be able to get on his health insurance plan provided by the army. And lastly, the army would pay for my last four years of college... and because I am not eligible for financial aid, that would save us about 150,000 dollars in loans (after interest) once I am graduated.

If we get married now, there would be no ceremony since it's too last minute... he leaves for Iraq in 2 months. We would just sign the papers and be legally married. In your opinion, is this a mistake? Is it selfish or in bad taste? We both intend on getting married to each other, and we both love one another and have faith in the relationship. If we get married now, we intend on having a big ceremony in a year or two. What do you think? I mean if we are getting married anyway and love each other, shouldn't we just do it now and make our lives in the future easier?

All opinions are welcomed and appreciated! Thanks! :)

I think if you both really love each other, the there's no reason to wait. Get married now and you have the rest of your life to have the perfect wedding. Follow your heart and everything else will fall in to place.

Q: I'm involoved with a married man and have been for two years now. We started out as just friends and the relatonship evolved.He's scared to leave his wife because they share two children together. I'm very much in love with him and want to be with him. Lately I've been feeling he's been wasting my time because he hasn't left her yet and I feel he never will. When I ask when will he leave or make a decision on leaving, he tells me he cant leave his kids with her and wants to know he could get full custody before he leaves. What should I do in this situatuion? HEEEELLLLLPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!

Do you honestly want to be the cause of a broken family? How would you feel if you were in his wife's shoes? Remember this: If he can cheat with you, he WILL cheat ON you. On second thought, maybe that's what you deserve. What goes around comes around.

Q: My friend that i have known for a long time has just revealed to me that he is gay. I love him to death. What should i do ??

Love him to death, as you always have.

Q: Ok, First off I am 12/f and I have a lota friends, but I am single. My one guy friend said that this one guy liked me, but he is too afraid to ask me out because he is afraid that I will turn him down. I already told his friend that if he asked me i would say yes. He's not hot or anything but I'm pretty good friends with him and everything and I can't turn him down because I'm friends with him and he is pretty cool. My friend said that he talks about me all the time and keeps saying that he is gonna ask me out, but he hasn't yet. I'm tired of being single and I wish he would just ask me already! What should I do? Should I just ask him out or what? Help me please.

Thanks in advance....*me* lol

I think you should go ahead and ask him out. If you like him and he likes you, then go for it. Why wait for him to make the first move? Good luck.

Q: ok heres the issue-
theres this guy at my school(lets call him josh) and me and josh always hang out at school. about the second day after we started hanging out, josh started to flirt with me. ALOT. the problem is hes a senior, and i think he has a girlfriend, but she doenst go to our school. should i flirt back???
thanks

There's nothing wrong with flirting. Just be sure that you don't let it go further than that if he does have a girlfriend.

Q: Ok for Valentines Day I am getting my boyfriend of almost 9 months a box of chocolates, a dozen lollipops that taste really good-have REALLY long stems-the actually candy part of it looks like glass, and a silver key with a heart engraved on it with our intitials on it (K+C). Is that a good idea if not what are some good ideas?

ps. NO colonge bc i like how he smells already, he wouldn't like a teddy bear, prolly wouldn't like a mix cd w. love songs on it, and no boxers (I am not sure of how his mom would feel about that)

I don't think you need any help in the gift department. You have some great ideas already, just go with that.

Q: What if you think your falling for your best friend and its not a guy and you know she BI do u tell her how you feel? or what Help i kno this sounds gay but please help!!

I think you should tell her. If you know she's bi, then she's the one person who will understand how you feel more than anyone else. Confide in her and see what happens.

Q: Do you think its wrong for a tenth grader to like a seventh grader even if the seventh grader is supposed to be in eighth grade? Im a female tenth grader and theres this male seventh grader thats hella kewl....what do you think?

There's nothing wrong with that at all. I say go for it.

Q: I'm 21 and dating a guy right now. He reminds me of an axboyfriend of mine that died. He was my first and my first love too. This new guy reminds me of my ex so much. He acts the same, has the same mannerisms, dresses the same--as in neither of them ever wore blue jeans---and I'm falling so hard for this guy. I'm afraid of losing him again. I think it's a sign that I was supposed to meet and hook up with him. We're taking things real slow..and that's because we like each other so much...what's your imput?

You need to be careful and make sure that you are falling in love with this guy and not just the memory of the one that passed away. You can't expect him to be exactly like the other guy, the more you get to know him, the more differences you're bound to find. Make sure that you keep your heart open to the prospect of truly falling in love again and don't let a memory hold you back. I'm sure that your first love would want you to move on and be happy.

Q: How long would you be willing to date someone before you either left or proposed marriage to them? You being a 30 something female he being a late 30 something male.

I would wait at least a year before getting engaged, minimum, and 3 years maximum. After 3 years, if there's still no ring, he definitely has commitment issues.

Q: I think I like my ex boyfriend again..but I'm not really sure if he likes me the same way anymore..we broke up a lil while ago, but sometimes when I see him I feel like I wanna be with him again, but whnever we don't talk..it's like it's awesome just being friends..it's mainly just whenever I see him though! I can't talk to him about it, because I'm afraid he might not like me the same way anymore, and I'll feel like a complete fool!! We're going to homecoming together, but I'm not sure if that means anything! What should I do?

It's important to consider why ya'll broke up in the first place. Enjoy the friendship that you have with him, and if it's meant to be more than friendship let nature take it's course. As I've said before, Follow your heart and everything else will fall into place.

Q: ok well i dated this chick and we dated for 3 months thas my longest relationship and she was my first love and well she left me for her ex bf but lately shes been callin me a bunch and flirtin w/ me and actin like were datin again and i dont know wut to do, should i keep this up and see wut happens or should i do sumthin cuz i dont want to be the "other guy" and it kinda looks like thas wuts gonna happen

There's nothing wrong with being friends with an ex. Just make sure that it doesn't go beyond friendship. Also make sure that she knows that you aren't interested in pursuing a romantic relationship while she's still involved with the other guy.

Q: i took a girl on a first date with a girl and she is a sophmore and i am a freshman. she made me pick the movie and i accidently picked a blood and guts movie. she said she liked it and i asked her the next day for a second date and she said yes. do you think this is a second date out of pitty?

Some girls do actually like those kind of movies. If she said yes for a second date, then she's probably interested in you. She could have said no, or made up some excuse, but she didn't. This is not a pity date.

Q: My ex-boyfriend cheated on me, twice. When we broke up, I had no idea he had done this and when we got into a huge fight he told me. I feel so hurt, worthless and betrayed. He was the only boy I ever truly loved and he had told me he felt the same. We've been talking now, and he says he still loves me and wants me back. His sorry's aren't taking away the heartache but I still love him more than anything. I don't know if I can trust him yet and he's cheated on other girfriends. Do you think he could really mean it this time? I can never seem to move on from him and he regrets cheating completely. What am I supposed to do or say?

I guess I'm a bit cynical when it comes to cheating. I'm a firm believer in once a cheater always a cheater. There are two things that I absolutely do not tolerate in a relationship and that's abuse and cheating. When you look at it cheating is really a form of abuse...emotional abuse.

bio

I can give advice to anyone of any age, because I'm still young enough to be able to relate to the problems that teens face, but I'm not so young that I haven't had to deal with adult issues. So if you have any questions, just drop them in my inbox, and I'll answer them as soon as I can.